GetInsideHer:TheFemalePerspectiveDirtySecretsFromAWomanOnHowToAttrack,Seduce,

andGetAnyFemaleYouWantMarniKinrysTHEULTIMATEWINGGIRL

EditedbyRebeccaMcLeod

Copyright2012VelocityHousePublishing

Copyright2012MarnieKinrys

ISBN:978-1624090127

Allrightsreserved.Nopartofthisdocumentmaybereproducedortransmittedinanyform,eitherbyelectronicormechanicalmeansincludinginformationstorageandretrievalsystemswithoutthepriorwrittenpermissionofthepublisher.Theonlyexceptionisforareviewerwhomayquotebriefpassagesinthereview.

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Whileeveryefforthasbeenmadebytheauthorandallassociatedcontributorstopresentaccurateanduptodateinformationwithinthisdocument,itisapparenttechnologiesrapidlychange.Therefore,theauthorandallassociatedcontributorsreservetherighttoupdatethecontentsandinformationprovidedhereinasthesechangesprogress.Theauthorand/orallassociatedcontributorstakenoresponsibilityforanyerrorsoromissionsifsuchdiscrepanciesexistwithinthisdocument.

Theauthorandallothercontributorsacceptnoresponsibilityforanyconsequentialactionstaken,whethermonetary,legal,orotherwise,byanyandallreadersofthematerialsprovided.Itisthereaderssoleresponsibilitytoseekprofessionaladvicebeforetakinganyactionontheirpart.

Readersresultswillvarybasedontheirskilllevelandindividualperceptionofthecontentsherein,andthusnoguarantees,monetarilyorotherwise,canbemadeaccurately.Therefore,noguaranteesaremade.

TableofContents

TitlePage

Copyright

Dedication

Preface

Introduction

I.WhattheFdoWomenWant?

II.HowToApproachWomen

III.HowtoTalktoWomenandCreateAttraction

IV.TheDatingPlaybook

V.HowtoAvoidtheFriendZone

VI.HowWomenWantIt!TheHow,What,Where,WhenandWhyBehindEveryFemaleAction.

VII.Conclusion

VIII.References

DedicationIthankeverypersonIhaveeverencounteredwhomademefeelanxious.Eachofthosepeoplepushedmybuttonsandfrustratedmeatthetime,butultimatelytheseencounterspushedmetobecomethewomanIamtoday.

Idedicatethisbookto:

JustineMazinforherincredible,funnychapterintroductions.

AllthemenwhohavesupportedtheWingGirlMethodandmeforthepastdecade.

Theex-boyfriendsthathurtorlovedme.

Myamazingmalefriends.

Mykick-assgirlfriendswhohaveallowedmetointerrogatethemforintimatedetailsandstrapmicrophonestotheirbodiessoIcouldcompletemyresearch.

Myfamily,forsupportingmeandmyideasnomatterhowcrazytheyseemed

Thebestmanamongallmen,myhusband.WithouthimIwouldnothaveanexampleofwhatittrulymeanstobeamanthatwomenwant!HeisamanwhoIhopetospendtherestofmylifewith.

Specialthankstomyindustrypeeps:everyoneinTheSeductionSyndicate,SeanStephenson,EbenPagen,CarlosXuma,DavidWygant,JoshPellicer,MarkLing,NinaRubin,NeilStrauss,RossJefferies,NicolePowers,BrianGross,KellyPerkins,andRabbiShwartzie.

PrefaceIhavebeentryingtowritethisbookforfouryears.BytryingImeanattemptingtopawnofftheworkonsomeoneelsewhoIthoughtcouldmorecreativelypresenttheworkIvebeendoingfornearlyadecade.

EverytimeItried,thewriterfailedtoconveywhatIwanted.ThecontentofthebookdidntconveythepassionIhaveformylifeswork.Iwantedperfection.IwantedeveryonetolovewhatIwroteandIwantedeveryguywhopickedupabookwithmynameonittobemagicallymotivatedandtransformed.

ThenIrealizedsomething

IwasdoingexactlywhatItellmen,everyday,tostopdoing.IwasstoppingmyselffromgoingafterwhatIwantedbecauseIwasafraidoffailure.Justasyoucannotattractandcharmthepantsoffeverywoman,youcannotcreatetheperfectbookthatwillmotivateandtransformeveryman.

SoIsaid,Fuckit,andstartedputtingtogethermybook!Myadvicehasalreadyhelpedhundredsofthousandsofmenaroundtheworld.Alittlepoorgrammarandshoddyspellingwerenotgoingtoholdmeback.Thisbookrepresentsclosetoadecadeofhardwork,constanttesting,aswellasyearsofbeinginthetrencheswithclientsandfriends.

ThisbookisacompilationoftheworkIhavebeendoingforalmostadecade.IvegatheredwhatIthinktobemybestblogs,articles,newsletters,emailstoclients,stories,andresponsestocommentsonmywebsiteandIhaveputthemallintooneplace.

Thisbookisnotdesignedtomakeyoufeelgoodaboutthethingsyouhavedoneinthepast.Mencometomywebsite,signupformyprogramsandbuymybooksbecausetheywantafemaleperspective.Imakeitmygoaltogivethemthatperspective,andsometimesithurts.

Itcanbehardtohearthatyouvebeengoingaboutgettingadateintotallythewrongway,butitcanstoprightnow.Asawomanwhostudieswhatwomenwant,Iamgoingtotellyouexactlyhowtoapproachwomen.

Youaregoingtolearnin-depth,realthingsaboutwomen;thethingstheywant,thethingstheyexpect,andwhywhatyouaredoingnowandhavebeendoinguntilnowisnotworking.ThepiecesIhavegatheredforyoudonottellyouhowwomenshouldact;theytellyouhowtheydoact.

Enjoy.

MarniKinrys,WorldsBestFemalePUAoftheYear(2010,2011)

IntroductionIwaitedbackstageattheRenaissanceHotelballroom,wherethePick-UpArtistSummitwasinfullswingandIwasthenextscheduledspeaker.IfyouarenotfamiliarwiththetermPick-UpArtist,itmeansaman(generally)whoisskilledatmeeting,attracting,andseducingwomen.

Typically,Pick-UpArtists,orPUAs,areassociatedwiththeseductioncommunity,aheterosexualmalesubculturebasedonthegoalofimprovedsexualandromanticabilitieswithwomen.ForyearsthisworldhasbeenkeptasecretbutwiththesuccessofVH1sshowThePickUpArtistandNeilStraussbestsellingbookTheGame(Strauss,2005),itsnotsosecretanymore.Infact,ithasbecomeabigbusiness.

ThePUASummitisagatheringoftheworldstopPUAsandtheirfollowerswhoareeagertolearn.Someoftheexpertsteachpick-uplines,whileothersteachroutines,butallteachtheirmethodontheartofgettingthegirl.IfyoureconfusedastowhyI,awoman,wasspeakingatthePUASummit,letmegiveaquickdescriptionofmyjob:Ipickupwomenformen.

MynameisMarniandIamaprofessionalWingGirl.

Menpaymetohelpthempick-up,attract,date,andgetthewomentheywant.Nottobrag,butImreallyfreakinggoodatit.BesidesbeinginvitedtospeakatthePUASummitthisyearwhereIwasawarded,WorldsBestFemalePUAoftheYear,Ihavesuccessfullyhelpedthousandsofgreatmengetthewomentheywant.

SohowdidaniceJewishgirllikemegetintothisprofession?Istartedmybusiness,thesamewaymostpeopledo:drunkandbyaccident.

OneFridaynight,IattendedaShabbatdinneratthehomeofRabbiShwartzie.IamnotreligiousbutIwasnewtoLosAngelesandwantedtoconnectwithmypeople.JustlikeanyotherJewishevent,thisdinnerwasalsoasinglesmixer.Ihadrecentlystarteddatingsomeone(whoIamnowmarriedto)butfelttherewasnoharminwindow-shopping.

Thematchingmakingsoireewasofftoarockystart,andtheeventfeltmorelikeajuniorhighdancethanasinglesmixer.Boysononesideoftheroom,girlsontheotherside.Noonewasinteracting.Istartedgrabbingmenandpushingthemtotalktowomen.Whentheywerefinishedinteracting,Iwouldgivethemfeedbackontheirtechnique,madetweaksandsendthemoutagain.Bytheendofthenight,peopleweremixing,exchangingnumbers,andhavingagreattime.

Iwenthome,buzzedfromthenightandtheopenbar,andspoketomyroommate.Iwasinpublicrelationsatthetimeandhatedeverysecondofit.Isaidtohim,WhatifIcoulddowhatIdidtonight,butasajob?WhatifIwasaprofessionalWingGirl?Myroommaterespondedwith,TheresnowayguyswouldpayforaservicelikethatunlessyouthrewinaBJandcaseofbeer.Idisagreed,marchedintomybedroom,andputanaduponCraigslist.Itwentsomethinglikethis:Whatbetterwaytoattractbeesthanwithhoney?Allyouhavetodoissitback,relaxandIllbringthewomentoyou

Bythenextmorning,Ihadover75responsesandthestartofabrandnewbusiness!Ihavetoadmit;thefirstfewmonthsweresomewhatfrustratingbecauseIwastryingto

figureoutexactlywhatitwasthatIhadcreated.Themediapouncedonme,menwereintrigued,apimpevenwantedmetojoinhisring,andofcourse,myfamilywasconcerned.IhadnoideawhatIwasdoing,butIdidntletthatstopme.

ItookTheWingGirlMethodtoacompletelynewlevelwhenImetamannamedDavidDeAngelo.DavidinvitedmetospeakatoneofhisPUAeventscalledMasteringtheArtofApproachingWomen(Theartof,2010).WhatIdidntknowaboutDavidatthattime(realnameEbenPagen)wasthathewasamasteronlinemarketerandhewasfilminghisseminarsohecoulddistributeDVDstohundredsofthousandsofmenaroundtheworld.

ThatishowIfoundmyselfquicklypushedintotheworldofPick-Upartistryandbecamethefirstfemalerunandoperatedbusinessintheindustrydedicatedtohelpinggreatguysdatebeautifulwomen.Allofasudden,IwasrecognizedatStarbucksbymenwhohadseentheDavidDeAngeloDVDandwasgettingrequestsfromeverytopPUAaroundtheworldtointerviewmeformyuniquefemaleperspective.

Sincethen,IhavespentthelastdecadehelpingtensofthousandsofmenaroundtheworldgofrombeingMr.NiceGuytoMr.HolyShit,IWantHim!

NowIamgoingtodothesameforyou.

Itsnosecretthatwomenarehardtounderstand.Youcanneverbesurewhatwillturnuson,turnusoff,orarouseourfury.Inaddition,youdonotknowwhatwesaywhenguysarenotaround.Itiseasytofeellosttryingtoattractanddatewomenandmakesenseoftheirbehavior.Iknowhowconfusingthefemininenaturecanbe.

Imaginehoweasyyourlifewouldbeifyouunderstoodwomenaswellasyouunderstandsomanyotherthings!Withmyhelp,youwillnothavetoimagineanymore!Fromhereonout,youcanrefertomeasyourveryownWingGirl!Iamgoingtopeelbackthelayersofmysteryandrevealtoyouthesecretsoffemalenature.

ThatmeansIwilldowhatyouroldersisteroryourbestfemalefriendshouldhavedonealongtimeago:tellyoueverythingyouneedtoknowaboutwhatyouneedtobe,whatyouneedtodo,andwhatyouneedtochangeinordertoattractanddatethewomenyouwant.

However,beforewegoanyfurther,Iwanttomakeonethingcleartoyou:Iamnotapick-upartist!EventhoughitiswhereIgotmystart,IdonotconsidermyselfaPick-UpArtist.Idonotteachroutines,pick-uplinesoranytypeofromanticmanipulation.Infact,IbelievethatmuchofthetopPick-UpArtistmaterialactuallydoesmoreharmthanhelp.

Why?

Becausemanypick-uptechniquesstressthegoaloffeelingsuperiortowomeninordertogainsuccesswithwomen.Thiscreatesanunequaldynamiccausinginsecuritytobethedrivingforcebehindawomansattraction.Thisisunhelpfulbecausetheattractionisnotrealandtheinsecuritywillmanifestitselflaterintheformofincessanttestingandresistancetophysicalescalation.Ihaveseenmendevelopapproachanxietyandloseconfidencetryingtousethetechniquesrecommendedbyso-calledgurus(whodonotunderstandwomen).Infact,Ibelievethisisoneoftheprimaryreasonsthatmenhavetroubleattractingwomen.Theyarelisteningtoso-calledpick-upgurus.Thesesystemsactuallyendupturningmenintoanxiousteenagegirls,alwayswonderingifwhattheyare

doingisrightandbecomingnervousanduncollected.

TheWingGirlMethodisclear,itssimple,itsintuitive,anditseasytoputintopractice.Iamnotgoingtobogyoudownwithjargonorfancywordssothatyougoalongwithsomethingthatyouknowmakesnosenseinordertostripyouofyourmoney.Iamgoingtogiveyouthefacts.Mygoalisnottotransformyouintoaroboticmachinethatrepeatsthesamephrasesuntilitistaughtanewkillerroutine,buttohelpwomenappreciateyouforthegreatguyIknowyouare!

Iamgoingtogiveyoutheskill-setsthatallowyoutocarryonaregularconversationandactuallyrelatetothewomanyouaretalkingtoratherthansimplythrowinguparoutineonher.Theseskill-setsstaywithyouatalltimesandmakeitsosimplethatyoucanadaptthemtoanysituationanddealwithanyobstaclecalmlyandcoolly.

ThematerialsIprovidewillshowyouhowtoboostyoursexualandmasculineconfidencebygainingaclearerunderstandingofhowwomenwork,whattheywant,andwhytheydothethingstheydo.Thisstrongmasculinepresencewillallowyoutoattractwomen.

IknowwhatyouarethinkingShedoesntunderstand.

IwishIcouldsaythatwastrue,butforyearsIstruggledlikeyou-unsureofmyself,Isufferedfromseveresocialanxiety,andwasconstantlylivinginmyhead.Ittookatremendouswakeupcall-onethatputmylifeindanger-tostartmakingrealchangesinhowIapproachedotherpeople.ItreachedapointofsuchseveritythatwhenIwasonlytwenty-yearsoldIhadastroke.

Tosayitwasoneofthemoststressfulyearsofmylifewouldbeanimmenseunderstatement.Afterfollowingamantoacollege,onlytobreakupwithhimamonthlater,disconnectingfromallofmyfriendsandstrugglingwithaneatingdisorderformostofayear,mybodyhitabarrier.Whileworkingasasummercampcounselor,Icollapsed.WhenIawoke,Iwaspartiallyparalyzed.Icouldbarelycommunicatewiththosearoundme.

Fromthere,thingsjustgotworse.ItdidnotmatterthatIhadbleedinginmybrainthatresultedinaminorstroke.Thesideeffectscreatedadeepstateofself-consciousnessthanIhadneverfeltbefore.Iwasharshlyjudgingmyself,whichcreatedabarrierbetweenothersandme.

Iwaslonely,frustrated,andlost.Ittookalmosttwoyearstorecover.

Attheageof23,afterschool,IdecidedtomakeachangeandmovedtoLosAngeles.OnthedayIleft,Imadeahugepromisetomyself.Itoldmyself,ImgoingtobreakfreeofthejudgmentsIplaceonmyself.Imgoingtotrynewthings.Imgoingtomeetnewpeopleandbreakdownthesebarriersthatarestoppingmefromconnectingtoothers.

WhenIgottoLosAngeles,IdoveheadfirstintopushingmyselftodothingsthatIwasotherwiseafraidofdoing.ThemovetoLosAngeleshadbeenthebiggestriskIevertaken;whynottakejustonemore?Idecidedtogodancingdespitemyinjury,whichhadmadedancingnearlyimpossiblewithoutfeelingself-conscious.Imetnewandinterestingpeoplewhowerenotlikemebutthatwasokay.IcreatedanewlifeformyselfandIdiditthroughthegreatestadversityIhadeverfelt.

Sonowyouareprobablythinking,allrightshegetsmealittlebitmore,buthowisawomangoingtohelpmegainastrongmasculinecharacter?

Illtellyou.

Belief:Womengivebadadvicetomenaboutwhatwomenwant.

Truth:Mostwomengivebadadvicetomenaboutwhatwomenwant.

Manywomendonotactuallyunderstandwhattheywantorwhytheydothethingstheydo.Mostwomenwillbeabletotellyouexactlywhattheywishtheywanted,butveryfewareabletosaywhattheygenuinelywantorneedfromaman.Infact,Irecentlyputoutanadaskingforwomenwithopinionsonwhatwomenwantfrommen.Ireceivedover600responsesfromwomenaroundtheworld.

Beautiful,intelligentwomenwhoIlaterdiscoveredhadabsolutelynoideawhatitwastheywanted,whattheywereattractedtoorwhattheyrespondedtowhenfillingintheanswers.Iwasshocked.However,onethingIdidlearnisthatwomenareveryinterestedinbeingheard.Savethatnoteforlater!

Forsomewomen,itisdifficulttoadmittosomeofthebehaviorstheyrespondto.Thisiseitherbecausetheyareembarrassedorbecausetheyreallydonothaveacluebutdesperatelywanttofigureitout.Ialsofoundthatmostwomenplacethemselvesonasocialpedestalandarefearfuloffallingoff.

Ihavealwaysknownmanyguysgrowingupandoftensawthingsfromtheirperspective.Ihavewincedathowtheymisinterpretedwomen.Isawfirsthandthekeyplaceswherewomanmiscommunicatedtomenandwheremenfailedtounderstandthesignalswomenweresending.IhavecometounderstandwhatbothsidesmeanwhentheytrytoexpresswhattheywantandIhaveexperiencedthemisunderstandingmyselfandsawhowdestructiveitcanbetohappiness.

Ihavebeenattractedtomen.Ihavelovedmen,hatedmen,andbeenhurtbymen.Ihavegottenrevengeonmen,feltinsecurewithmen,andhadsexwithmen.Ihaveledmenon,flirtedwithmenforfun,andtakengreatpleasureinteasingmen.Ihavebrokenupwithmenfornoreason.Ihaveavoidedmen,flakedonmen,givenoutmynumberwithnointentionofansweringthephone.Ihavehadone-nightstandswithmen.Ihavebeeninlong-termrelationshipswithmen.IhaveevenplacedmenintheFriendZonewhenIknewtheydeservedaromanticchance.Ihaveexperiencedeveryscenarioyouhavepossiblyexperienced,butontheotherside.

Withmyhelp,youaregoingtobecometheguywhounderstandsthesubtlecommunicationthatoccursbetweenmenandwomen.Youwillbeabletoattractwomenbecauseyoullunderstandwhatwomenwanttocommunicate.Thesewomenwillbeattractedtoyou,notyourmoneyorpossessions,butwhoyouareandhowyoucanmakethemfeel.

HeresjustalittleofwhatIamgoingtoteachyou:Whatwomenarereallylookingfor

WhatdowomenreallymeanwhentheysaycertainthingsHowwomenevaluatemenHowyoucanfinetuneyourapproachHowyoucanavoidthemistakesthatmostmenmakeWhylooksdontmattertowomenHowwomencansenseamanspresenceandintentionWhysayingtherightthingdoesntworkThedefinitesignsthatshelikesyouandwhattodonextHowtoescalatesexuallywithwomenwithoutgettingslapped

Thisisjustthestart.

WithmeasyourpersonalWingGirl,youwillhoneanapproachthatisuniquetoyou.Youwillbecomeagreatcommunicator.Youwillunderstandhowtopleaseawomanbothemotionallyandsexually.Youwillbecomeamanthatwomenwant.Youwillalsobecomethemanyouhavealwayswantedtobe.

HowtoUseThisBookThisbookwaswrittentoprovideadviceonavarietyoftopics,allforunderstandingmycrazygender.WhatIhopeyoulearnfromthisbookisthatwomenarenottheenemyandthattheyarenotmythical,magicalcreatureswithbreasts,best-suitedforapedestal.Theyaregood,decent,lovingpeople,justlikeyou.

Thisbookcanbereadinsmallchunksforwhenyouneedspecificadvice.Youcanalsodivestraightinandreadthebookcovertocover.ThemostimportantthingisthatyoureadwithanopenmindandunderstandthatwhatIsharewithyoumaynotbethemostappealingpictureofwomenyouwilleversee.However,itisthemostaccurate.

Therearelittlesurprisessprinkledthroughoutthebook-youmaywanttogobackthroughifyouskipoveranythingtomakesureyoucatchthose!

Toaccessthesespecialbonuses,alongwithsomesurprisesfromme,goto:http://www.topsecretdatingadvice.com/getsexy/

Enoughchitchat,letsgetstarted!

I.WhattheFdoWomenWant?Donotbetimidortentative.Amanwhoisself-assuredandassertive

willtouchinacasualmanner,withouthesitancyoruncertainty.

CLAIRE,32

Therearemanyclichsaboutfindinglove.Youwillknowitwhenyouseeit.Whenyouknow,youknow.Itwillfeeldifferentfromanythingyouhaveeverfelt.Theseareallverymysticalnotions.Theyarealsoveryaggravating.Theideaofknowingorfeelingindicatesthattheresahigherpowerinvolved,thatthiskindofattractionisbasedonchemistry,onplanetsandsigns,ondestinywhatyoudoorsayhasnothingtodowithit.Womenareusuallytheoneswhousetheseclichs,andtheyusethemwithgoofygrinspaintedacrosstheirfaces.Ijustknew.Ihadbutterflies.Itcanhappentoyoutoo.AsyourWingGirl,Iwillletyouinonalittlesecret:Loveisnotascosmicallydeterminedaswomenwouldliketobelieve.

Thereisarecipeforcreatingbutterflies,andIamgoingtogiveittoyou.

WhatTheyDefinitelyDontWant

DoWomenReallyPreferBadBoystoNiceGuys?

ManymenbelievewomenwanttobewiththeBadBoyandthatbeinglabeledasNiceisthekissofdeath.ThefirstthingthatIwanttogetoutthereisthatwomendowanttobewithaniceman;whattheydonotwantisamanwhoisawimp.Thereisabigdifference.NiceissimplythepolitetermwomenusewhenwhattheyreallymeanisGrowsomefreakingballsandstopbeingawimp!

WomenDoNotWanttoBeWiththeBadBoy!

IhaveneverheardofawomansittingwithherfriendsduringGirlsNightwhosaid,IcantwaituntilImeetajerkwhowilltreatmepoorly,belittlemeonadailybasis,andshowabsolutelynorespectforme.Ifthatiswhatyoubelievewomenwantwehavesomeseriousworktodo!

IwilladmitthatIunderstandhowthisrumorstartedandwhysomanymenstillbelievethatactinglikeajerkwillgetthemeverythingtheywantwithwomen.Everydayyouseewomenwithguyswhoyouknowdontdeservethem;jerksordownrightdouchebagswithamazingwomenbytheirsides.Youmayevenbetheshoulderthatthosewomencryonwhentheseguysactlikeselfishscumbags.Youthinktoyourself,Imagreatguy;Ishouldbewiththisgirl.Ihavetobecomejustlikethosejerkssothatgirlswilldateme.LetmeexplainwhythesewomenkeepgoingbacktothoseBadBoycharacters.

Sadly,theBadBoysaretheoneswhoapproachwomen.NiceGuysrarelyapproachwomenandiftheydo,theyscrewitupeverytimebecausetheyinstantlyputthewomanonapedestal.BadBoysareconfidentinthemselves,respectthelivestheyhavecreated,andtheygoafterthewomentheywantwithoutfearofrejection.Inthebeginning,they

displaycharacteristicsofamananygirlwouldwanttobewith.Theyshowconfidence,self-respect,independence,leadership,passion,anddesirabilitytootherwomen.Thensomethinginterestinghappens.Slowlytheirtruecolorsstarttoshowanditbecomesapparentthattheyarejerks.

However,bythispointawomanishookedontheBadBoy.Shebelievesthatherfirstevaluationofhimwascorrectandisembarrassedbyherseemingstupidity.Shetriestochangehimbackintothatgreatguythatshebelieveshesecretlyis.Shetriestomakehimintoamanhewillneverbe.Andsotheviciouscyclebegins.Itcontinuesuntilsheisfinallyreadytogiveupandcutherlosses.Thiscantakealongtime.

Iseeithappenconstantlywithmyfemalefriends.Ihearthemcomplain,getmad,andtryeverythingtoturntheirBadBoyintotheNiceGuytheythoughthewas,andthattheydemandhebe.IcantellyouforafactthatwomendonotwanttobewithBadBoys,Jerks,andassholes.Whowould?

WhatwedowantisamixoftheKnightinShiningArmorwhosweepsusoffourfeetandtheBadBikerBoyfromthewrongsideofthetrackswhotakesusonathrillride.Awomanwantsamanwithabackbone,onewhowilltellherwhensheiswrong.Shewantsamanwhowillnotliedownandplaydeadwhensheisbeingoverlydemandingorbossy.

Astrong,independentwomanwantsamanwhowilltreatherwell.Shewillnotgosearchingforaplayeroratwo-timingdouche-bag.Allweareaskingforisamantotreatuswithrespectyetatthesametimerespecthimself.WomendonotwanttobewithaBadBoy.WhatwomenwantistobewithaNiceGuythatisconfidentandaleader;whoholdsboundaries,andrespectshimself.ANiceGuywithalltheBadBoystrengths.Inmyeyes,NiceGuyswillalwayshavemassivesexappeal!

WhyMenGiveBadAdvice

JustwhenIthink,Ihavetakenmentwostepsforward,Igetemailsliketheonefollowing.EmailsfromguystellingmetheyhavestumbleduponPick-UpArtistmaterialsoradvicefromareputableresourcethattheirfriendsrecommend.Inevitably,itblowsupintheirfaces.CheckouttheemailonthenextpagefromaguywhostumbleduponanoldTomLeykissegmentandwasgiventhetypicaladviceofjusttreatgirlslikecrap.Also,checkouthowthetacticblewupinhisface!

Myreply:

Pleasedonotlistentoanyonewhotellsyouthatwomenareattractedtomenwhotreatthemlikecrap.Thewomenwhoaredrawntothistypeofabusearehighlyinsecureand

comewithtonsofbaggage.Trustme,youdonotwanttodealwiththat.

TooMuchGameCanRuinYourChanceswithWomen

ManymengetcarriedawaytryingtoplayTheGamesocarriedawaywithbeingcharmingthattheylosethegirl!Listen,IamthefirstonetoadmitthatIlovethegame!Ilovethebanter,thebutterflies,theteasing,allofit.Itisfun,butonlyforanight,maybetwoatthemost.Afterthat,IneedsomethingalittlemoresubstantialorIllmoveon.

AwhilebackwhenIwasfirstintroducedtotheworldofthePick-UpArtists,Imetoneofitsleaders,Mystery,whilespeakingataDavidDeAngeloseminar.IncaseyoudonotknowwhataPick-UpArtistis,Iwillexplain.APick-UpArtistisamanwhoconsidershimselfskilled(orwhotriestobeskilled)atmeeting,attracting,andseducingwomen.ThetermPick-UpArtistisassociatedwiththeseductioncommunitywhichisaheterosexualmalesubculturebasedonthegoalofimprovedsexualandromanticabilitieswithwomen.Pick-UpArtistsdeveloppick-uplines,routines,andgambits.Theyaimtoimprovetheirseductivecapabilitiesthroughthedevelopmentofdifferentlifestyles.ManyPick-UpArtistsusemanipulativetacticstofeedoffawomansinsecurities,seduceher,andgetwhattheywant.Thesetechniquesnotonlyhurtwomenbutalsomen.ThemorewomeninteractwithasaidPick-UpArtistsandgethurt,themorecautioustheywillbewithallmen.Thismeanshigherhurdlesforregularguystojumpover.

BacktomypointImetMystery.Hewasatallmanwearingatophat,nailpolishandaleotard.Ikidyounot.Heintroducedhimselfbyteasingmeandtellingmestories,whichhonestlykeptmecaptivatedforanhour.Iunderstandhowhisgameworks,anditworkedonme.Iwasexcited,bubbly,anddyingforhimtowantme.DidIwanthim?Notatall,butIwantedhimtowantme.Doyouseethedifference?

Ididnotfallmadlyinlovewithhim,nordidIthinkwehadagreatconnection,butIhadanurgeforhimtolikemeandwantme.Onceweseparated,though,Ididnotthinkofhimagain.Ididntwanttotalktohimthenextdayorforhimtocallme.IgoteverythingoutofhimthatIwanted.Iknewtherewasnothingelsehecouldoffer.HismagiconlyworkedforashortperiodoftimebecauseIhadnothingrealtofeelconnectedto.Iwassimplyentertained.

ManyofthementhatIworkwithonadailybasisareorhavebeenpartofthePick-UpArtistcommunity.TheyhaveconsumedtonsofPick-UpArtistmaterialsandhaveprobablydoneabootcamportwowithatopPick-UpArtist.Thesemenhavenoproblemengagingandapproachingwomen,buttheyallcometomewiththesameproblem.

WheredidIgowrong?HowdidIloseher?

Theanswertothosequestionsisthattheyweresowrappedupinthegamethattheyforgottobepresentandconnecttothewomaninfrontofthem.Theyhavelearnedtocaptureanaudiencebuttheyhavenotlearnedhowtomakethataudiencewantmore.Atthecore,mostPick-UpArtistprogramsmeanwell.However,ifusedincorrectly,theydoalotmoreharmthangood.

Theseprogramsfallshortbecausetheydehumanizemenandwomenalike,makingitnearlyimpossibletoformarealconnection.Iamgoingtogiveyouastraightandhonest

femaleperspective.Asaman,youhavetogivewomenalittlemorethanentertainmenttowinherheart.Ireceivemanyoftheseemails,butIjustwanttoshareafewwithyouthatshowthekindsofmistakesmentendtomakewhentheytakethewrongadvice.

Thefollowingemailisfroma26-year-oldmaninLondon,England.

HeyMarni,

WantedtoaskyouaquestionbutIamgoingtoneedtoexplainthesituationtoyoufirstsoyougetthefullpicture.Itwasasinglessocialboat-cruise,andthefollowingaretheeventsthathappenedwithoneofthecutiesthatIaminterestedindating.Needsomeopiniononhowtopickupthemomentum.

TheparticularcutiethatcaughtmyeyeIapproachedbygrabbingherbyherarmandtellinghertofollowme.Shecamealongwillingly.

Me:Whywereyouavoidingmeallnight?

Her:Iwasnot;youwerebusyrunningaroundwithothergirls.

Me:Wait,areyousingle?

Her:Yes,ofcourse.

Me:Youhadbetterbe,otherwiseIwouldhavetokickyouofftheboat!

Her:*Deadair*

Me:Areyouagoodgirloranicegirl?

Her:Naughtybutnice.

Me:DoyouspeakEnglish?

Her:Yes.

Me:Chooseonethengoodornice?

Her:NiceIguess.

Me.Doyouknowthedifference?

Her:Youtellme.

Me:GoodGirlgoesout,comeshomeandsleeps;NiceGirlgoesout,sleepsandcomeshome.

Her:*Deadair*

Me:DoyouknowthedifferencebetweenGoodSecretaryandaNiceSecretary?

Her:No,goahead.

Me:GoodSecretarywillsay,Goodmorning,Sir,andNiceSecretarywillsay,Itsmorning,Sir.

Her:*Deadair*

Thenwehaveachataboutwheresheisstaying,herethnicmix,andplacesshehas

traveled.SheturnsouttobeSingaporeanandBritish.

Me:IbetyousuckatThumb-Wrestling!

Her:Bringiton.

Me:Idonotplaywithoutawager.

Her:Whatisthewager?

Me:Loserbuysdinner.Her:Okay.

Me:NoCheating!Bestoutofthree,go!

Lastround,Istarttotickleherandwrestlewithher.Itisgoodfunwithsometension.IloseonpurposebecauseItickledher.Isay,Okay,givemeyournumberandwellsetsomethingup.Wepart.Thenexthour,weexchangeglancesandIthrowafewImwatchingyouandStayoutoftroublelinesather,atwhichshegiggles(mostprobablyfromanicedosageofalcohol).

Friday:Cooloff.

Saturday:Messagehertocheckifshegothomealiveandaskforheremailaddress.Sherepliesokayandgivesmeheremailaddress.

SundayMorning:Callandleaveamessage.Shecallsbackandwehaveachataboutsettingadate,butwebothhavecommitments.Shementionsbrieflytobeincontactnextweekendifwecandosomethingtogether.Isay,Okay,wellsee.

Ithenaskherwhatsheisdoing.Itsalmostnoon,whyisshelazinglikeapig?ShegigglesandsaysshehasplanswithsomefriendstowatchSexandtheCity.

Me:Sowhichcharacterbestdescribeyou?

Her:Idontknow,whatdoyouthink?

Me:IthinkyouareaSamanthainCharlottedisguise.

Her:No,noonelikestobeher.Itsnotnice.

Me:Areyoujudgingher?Youareevenmoreevil.

Her:No.

Me:Imustgo,gottraining,willcallandcatchup.

ItextherlatertellingherIhadtocuthershortbecauseIwasdealingwithLondontraffic.Willcallatnighttocatchupandhavesomestimulatingconversations.EndwithCharlotteandawink.Icalledherat10:30pm,wenttohervoicemail.Isay,Ah,playinghardtoget?Cheeky!Hollerback!Ihavenotheardfromhersince.

Tuesday11pm,sentherafunnytext:Itsimportanttofindamanwhohasmoney,amanwhoadoresyou,andamanwhoisgreatinthesack.Itisalsoimportantthatthesethreemenshouldnevermeet!Howareyoudoing?Didnotreceiveanyreply.

AnyopinionastohowIcanpickmygameupagain?

Myresponsetotheemail:

WhatInoticedfromyouremailisthatyouneedtostopplayinggames.Gameslikethisarefuninthemoment.Theyareentertainingandgetagirlsheartracing,butoncethismomentpasses,realitysetsinandgirlsrealizewhatthisbehaviorreallymeans.Itmeansgamesandsexwithnophonecallthenextday.

Youhadherinyourfirstinteraction,andtobehonest,ifyouhadinitiatedtakingittothenextlevel(bedroom,kiss,whatever),mostlikelyshewouldhaveplayedball.However,youstretcheditoutwithherandthereforetheendlessbanterbecametiresomeanddull.OnethingIwanttopointouttoyouwastheSexandtheCityjoke.

First,Iwasimpressedthatyouknowthecharacters.Thatsastart.

Second,nowomanwantstobereferredtoasaSamanthabyamanwhoistryingtosleepwithher.IfyoucallagirlSamantha,youaretellingherYouresluttyandIthinkyoureeasy.Evenifitistrue,nowomanwantstohearthat.Thatlittlestatementwillhaveherfeelingthatthereisonlyonethingonyourmind.

Womenwanttobeincontroloftheirownsexualityandknowtheyarerespectedeveniftheyaresexuallyadventurousandopen.Donotpigeon-holewomenbytellingthemwhotheyare;letthemtellyouwhotheyare.

Youwillgetmuchmoreoutofawomanthatway.Alwaysgiveawomansomethingshecanlatchonto.Somethingshecanholdontothatmakesherfeelthatthereismoretothisthangames,banter,andplayfulness.

Overall,Iwantyoutorecognizethatbalanceisimportant.Banterandflirtingisfunandexciting,andmostwomen,especiallythegreatones,willengageinit.However,youmustbalancethebanterwithsubstanceoryouwillnevergetwhatyouwantfromawoman.

Theessentialpiecetoanyinteractionwithawomanisconnection.

Connectionisneededineverysituationwithawoman.One-nightstands,dating,long-termrelationships,marriage,andeveryotherpossiblesituationrequireconnection.Withoutconnection,youwillnevertrulyhaveawoman.Eventhoughbanterbuiltonpick-uplinesandroutinescanbefun,youhadbetterhavesomethingelsetoofferorelseyouwillgohomealone.

Angry,BitterMenDoNotGetLaid

Neverinthehistoryoftheworldwasabitter,angry,frustratedmanlaid.Unlesshepaidforit,butIguaranteewhomeverhepaidwasnothappyaboutit.EverydayIgethundredsofemailsfromgreatmen.EverydayIalsoreceiveemailsfrommenwhoarefrustrated,whichcanturnintoangerandthenbitterness.Itissohardformetogetthroughtothem,buttrustmeItry.SometimesitworksandsometimesitfeelslikeImbangingmyheadagainstawall!

Overall,Irealizethatmanymenarefrustratedduetotheirnegativeexperienceswithwomen.Igetthat.Iknowmanywomenwhoareinexactlythesameplace.Becauseoftheirexperiences,theyputupwallsandmakeitdifficultforanymantogetclosetothem.

IwouldtellthesamethingstothesewomenthatIamgoingtosaytoyou:aslongasyoukeepthesewallsupandmaintainthebeliefthatallmembersoftheoppositesexareevil,youwillnevergetwhatyouwant.Thosewallsmakeitimpossibletomakearealconnectionwithanyoneelse!

IwanttoshareagreatemailIreceivedfromaguywho,withmyhelp,finallyletgoofhisfrustrationsandsuddenlysawresultswithwomen.

Marni,

Youwontremembermebutaboutayearandahalfago,Ihitoneofyourblogs.Istupidlyleftarantofallmyangerandfrustrationstowardswomen.Yourespondedbacktomewithareallywarmbutfirmresponse.ThismademetakeahardlookbackatmylifeandIrealizedwomenwerenotatfault.Iwasforpushingthemawaywhentheytriedtogetclose.

Afterthisintrospection,Ibegantochangemylifebyworkingoutthreenightsaweekwithmycousinandjoiningthelocalartassociationphotographygroup.Therearesomerealprosthereandtheyareimpressedwithmywork.Im43andnowhavetwentysomethingshittingonme.Ineedtocleartwofinalhurdles.

Excisemylimitingbeliefwomendonotwanttobewithmeandbeingabletoaskthesewomenout.Ihavemissedafewopportunitieslastyearduetothisone.Iamworkingonthese.Iacceptresponsibilityformylackofagirlfriendandamworkingtowardsthisgoal.Iapologizeforthelengthofthismissivebutwantedyoutoknowyouhelped.

Thankyou.

Lovedthisemail!

Believeitornot,emotionalblocksorfalsebeliefsaboutwomencanactuallyhurtyourchanceswithwomen.Theymaynotbeasmajorasthisgentlemanswere,buttheycanstillhaveahugeeffectonyou.Myhusbandusedtohaveahugementalblock,nottowardsdating,butmarriage.Heusedtothinkthatmarriagewasthefirststeptodivorce.Awesomeforhisromanticinterests,right?Inhismind,ifheandIweretogetmarried,thenitwouldruinourrelationshipandwewoulddivorce.However,hisultimategoalwastohaveafamily.Hewastorn.HehadtoworkhardtochangethestoryhehadbeentellinghimselffromMarriageequalsdivorcetoMarriageisaboutcommitmentandlove.MarniandIwillworkhardtokeepourmarriagestrong.Iwantafamilyandwecanmakethiswork.

Minortweaksinthestorieswetellourselvescantotallyalterthewaywemoveforwardintheworld.Icallthisre-framingandithasbeenpoppingupalotlatelywiththeguysthatIworkwith.Manyhavehorriblestoriesthattheytellthemselveseveryday.Forexample:

Imhorriblewithwomen.Ihavenoideahowtotalktowomen.Iamabadlover.

Womenwillneverwantme.Womenareevil.Iambadatrelationships.

Ifirmlybelievethatifyoudonottalknicelyaboutyourself,nooneelsewill.Igaveeachofthesemenanassignmenttoreframewhattheysaytothemselvesaloudforawholeweek.SoinsteadofsayingIcantapproachwomeninpublic,say:Ifeelnervousaboutapproachingawomaninpublic,butIknowthatIwantitsoIamgoingtodoit.ItwillnotbeasbadasIhaveimagined.

NoWomanLikesaPouncer

Justliketherestofmygeneration,IfellinlovewithTiggerfromWinniethePooh.Rememberthatadorable,pouncytiger?ItwasnotuntilrecentlythatIrealizedTiggerwasahorribleinfluenceontheyouthoftoday.Hepreachedaboutpouncingandhowitwasfun,fun,fun,fun,fun!Pouncingisnotandshouldnotbefunbecauseitcangetyouintotrouble!

InmybusinessasaWingGirl,Iencountermenwhoimpulsivelyrespondtotheiremotionsandpounceonwomen.Pouncingusuallyoccurswhenamanmeetsawomanheisattractedtoandwantshertofeelthesame.Hewantstobeperceivedastheperfectman.Hecallsconstantly,sharesfeelingstooquickly,isoverlyavailable,andcomplimentsfornoreason.Yougetthepicture.

Unbeknownsttomen,theseactionsscreamoutthattheyareneedy,dependent,anddesperate.Allattributesthatwomenareveryturnedoffby.Whyisitthatthisbehaviorisunattractive?Onewouldthinkthatattentionandtheshoweringofemotionswouldbeflatteringtoawoman.Notso.Thistypeofbehaviorturnsthemofffasterthanyoucansayketchup!

Whyisthisbehaviorsorepulsivetowomen?

Itisrepulsivebecauseitisnotmanly.Itisweakbehaviorfromamalewhodoesnotunderstandhisownvalue.Hesacrificeshisself-worthfortheattentionofanattractivestranger.Asawoman,Ifinditstrangewhenamanwhodoesnotknowmeiswillingtodropeverythinginhislifetopleaseme.Heknowsnothingaboutme.Whyishesoeager?Iautomaticallyassumethereissomethingwrongwithhim.Ithenproceedtododgehiscalls,makedatesthroughtextmessagethatIwilleventuallycancelatthelastminuteandtryhardtoavoidseeinghimeveragain.

Manyofmygirlfriendswhofindthemselvesinsimilarsituationsrespondexactlythesameway.Itistoomuch,toofast.ManyofthemenwhoIworkwithusedtoactthiswaytowardswomen.Theywouldpounceandthenbecompletelycrushedwhenawomandidnotrespondfavorablytotheirromanticbehavior.Iwouldenlightenthesemenbytellingthemwhattheirbehaviorwassayingtowomenandgetthemtoadmittowhytheywereactingthatway.Mostofthemenadmittedthatthistypeofbehaviorstemmedfrominsecurity,discomfort,andconfusion.Oncewegetthoseemotionsincheckandworkonbuildingself-respectandconfidence,weusuallyfindthatthepouncingstopsandtheystarttoseebetterresultswithwomen.

Myclientslearnthatthemoretheyvaluethemselves,themorewomenfeelthesamewayaboutthem.Thereisnoneedtopounce.Instead,theytaketheirtimeandevaluatewhetherornottheywanttoinvestfurtherinawoman.Theyfinallyunderstandthattheyareinvolvedinthechoicetoconnect.Sosinglemenoftheworld,listenup.Bestrong,respectyourself,andleavethepouncingtoTigger!Remember,theresareasonthathessingle.

DoMoney,SocialStatus,andPossessionsMatterToWomen?

Email:

IalwaysfeelinsecureifImeetagirlwhohasaccomplishedmorethanIhaveorhasabetterjob.

So,amIrightornot?

Jordan

Myresponse:

Jordan,

Wellthatinsecurity,myfriend,iswhatisgoingtoturnoffawomannothowmuchyouhave.Justbecauseawomanismoresuccessfulthanyouareorhasmorethanyoudoesnotmeanthatyouarelessofaman.Whatyouhavedoesnotmattertomostgreatwomen(Dontbotherwithgolddiggers,shallowwomen,etc.)Whatmattersiswhenyouletitaffectyouandmakeyouself-consciousaboutit.

Womenarenotbothereduntilyouvoicethatyouarebotheredbyyourmoney,socialstatus,orpossessions.Ifyouareanegative,freeloadingbumwhocomplainsaboutwhereheisinlifebutdoesnotchangethesituation,thenwomenwillnotfindyouattractive,atleastnotinthelongterm.

However,ifyouarepositiveaboutwhoyouare,yourjobandwhatyouhave,thenshewillbetoo.Aslongasyoualwaysremaintruetowhoyouareandstriveforgreatness,shewillbehappy.Ifnot,thenyouhavetoevaluatethepersonyouarewith.

Womenwanttoknowthattheyhaveapartnerwhoisproactiveaboutmakingagreatlifewithher.Thatdoesnotmeanyachtsandpartyingatclubs.Itmeanscharacter,support,andlove.Forthosewhoyoufeelaremoreaccomplishedrememberthatyoualsohaveareasthatyouareaccomplishedinthatshemaynotbe.Neverfeelbelowanotherperson.Learntorespectandacknowledgewhatyouandothershaveachieved.

Marni

WhyDoWomenRespondtoMeWhenIActLikeanAsshole?

Email:

Iamapassive,easygoingperson.Girlsneverreallyshowedmuchinterestinme.Then,justasanexperiment,Itriedactinglikeanassholeandmanygirlslikedmemore.There

wasmoreconnection.WhydogirlslikeitwhenIactlikeanasshole?

Myresponse:

Thethingisthatyouareactuallyaniceguy,soyourversionofactinglikeanassholeisactuallyjustyouactinglikeaguywithanedge.Deepdownyouarenotanassholeandwomencantellthatrightaway.Womenloveplayfulness,challenge,andteasing.Theydonotlikewhenaguybendsoverbackwardsforthemwithoutevenknowingthemandgivesupallhisself-worth.

Youhavetappedintosomethingamazing.Youhavegonefrompassivetoactive!Itissupersexyandyouaregettingresults.

Marni

DoINeedToBeFunnyToGetTheGirl?

Email:

Ipurchasedyourvideoandaudioprogramfromyourwebsite.First,Ihavetosayitwasamazingtobeabletohearhowallthosewomenreallytalkwhenmenarenotaround.ItwasgreatandIgotalotfromit.Ididhaveonequestiononsomethingsaid.Inthevideowithyouandyourfriends,someonesaysthatshewantstobeapproachedinafunway,withsomefunnycomment.

Now,Iunderstandthatbutthereisnotalwayssomethingfunnytocommentabout.Isitokaytojustgoandsay,Hi?Whatsyourname?Sometimeswomensaythattheywantmentobedirectbutalsosubtle,confidentbutnotcocky,etc.Itsconfusing,youknow!

Adam

Myresponse:

Adam,

Itotallyunderstandhowyoucouldfindthatcommentconfusingandfrustrating.Itisnotalwayseasytobringthefunny,especiallywhenyouarenotnaturallyanoverthetopfunnyguy.Whatshewassayingisthatshewantsamanwhodoesnottakethingssoseriouslyallthetimeandcanseethehumorinthings.BringsomethingtothetableotherthanyourdeepunderstandingofhowtowritethebestHTMLcodemanhaseverseen.

Thisdoesnotmeanyouhavetoperform,betheentertainer,orworkhardatmakingherfeelgood.Itmeansyouhavetobringsomethingtothetabletoaddtoherevening.Ihavehadmanymenwhoapproachmeandbringnothingtothetable.Nocharacter,noenergy,justabagofnerves,noconfidenceandexpectmetomakeallconversation.Formeitfeelslikepullingteeth.Ittakesawayfrommynight.

Iamanicegirlandwillgiveatleastfiveminutesofmytimetoamanthathastheconfidencetoapproach.Iampatient.Mostwomenwillnotgiveyouthattimeandiftheydo,itwillbefollowedbyalotofheadnodding,one-wordanswers,andthehopesof

findinganexcusetogetawayfromyou.

Igoouttohavefun.IworkalldayandwhenIgoout,Iwanttoenjoymyeveningnotdomorework.Sobringthefun,enjoylife,andbeabletolaughatyourself.Thatiswhatwomenmeanwhentheysaysenseofhumorissuperimportant.

Marni

IsItWrongToDateWomenYouKnowYouDoNotWant?

Email:

Marni,

Isitwrongtodatewomenknowingthatyouhavenoromanticinterestinthematallbutaredoingittogainexperience?SomeoneIknowadvisedmetodothis.Ifinditalittlebitmisleadingtodothis.Verysimilartowomenreceivingattentionfrommenknowingtheyhavenointerestinbeingromanticwiththatperson.Maybemythinkingiswrong,whatdoyouthink?

James

Myresponse:

Hmm,thatisastickyone.

Iwouldnotaskawomanoutthatyouarenotatallinterestedinjustsoyoucanpracticedating.However,ifyouareonadateandyourealize,EhImnotreallyintothisgirl,thatisokay.Thenyouhandleitlikeamanandtellheryouarenotreallyfeelingit.

Igetwhatyourfriendwastryingtoadvise.Hewantsyoutogetoutthere,practice,andnotbesofussyduringthistime.IwouldsaybelooserwithwhoyoudeemdatablebutIwouldnotdategirlsknowingyouareusingthem.

SeemslikethatcouldbringbadkarmaandIamnotevenintokarma.Myruleofthumbifyoueverhavedoubtaboutyouractionsistothinktoyourself,WouldIwantsomeonetodothattome?Iftheanswerisno,thendonotdoit.

Marni

HowLongShouldIKeepUpTheGame?

Marni,

Iamattemptingtolearnthejudiciousapplicationofmystery.Ihavebeenplayingwithittosomesuccess.Iactuallyenjoyit.Icanindulgethenovelistinmyself.Myquestion,howlongshouldIkeepupthegame?

Andy

Andy,

Gamesaremeanttobeplayedwhenyouareyoungeroronvacation,notallthetime.Youcanbemysterious,butwhenyoudecideyoulikeawoman,thatiswhenyoustarttoshare.Youcanstillholdontoyourinformation.Meaningbeprivateanddonotthrowitallonheratonce.

Thereisnoneedtocontinuetobecompletelymysteriousotherwise,shewillgetboredandmoveon.Worse,shewillbecomeinsecureandangryandyoudonotwanttoseethat.Trustme.

Marni

Surprise!TheThingsTheyDoWant.

TheShort,BaldManThatTurnedMeOn

Toillustratejusthowunimportantcertainstereotypesofattractionaretowomen,IwanttotellyouastoryaboutanightIspentoutwithmygirl-friends.Itwasntaparticularlyspecialnightbutweweregoingtomakethemostofit-ahipbarinLosAngeleswithmyamazinglyhotgirlfriends.

Whenwefirstgotthere,wescouredthebartoseeiftherewereanypotentialhotmen.Wespottedagroupofguysandploppedourselvesdownnexttothem,makingsuretheycouldseeus.Aswesatdown,theylookedoveratus,smiled,andthenhuddledtogether,glancingourwaybetweenboutsofconversation.

ThenoneguyturnedtoourtableandaskedWhatareyouladiesdrinking?MyfriendsandIwanttobuyyoudrinks.Ofcourse,wesaidyes!Afterthedrinksarrived,twooftheguyscameovertoourtableandstartedgabbingonandonaboutahugefinancialdealtheyhadjustclosed.Oneofthemthentalkedaboutanewcarhehadjustpurchased,andhedidnotforgettomentiontheprice.

Ilookedateachofmyfriendsandcouldseeeachwasindividuallygivingthehelpmeeyes.Thehelpmeeyesareaninternationalfemalesignalthatsaytootherwomen,Helpme.Iwanttogetawayfromthisguy.Itisverysubtleanddifficultformentoseeiftheyarenotawareofthepractice.

Toseeanexampleofthehelpmeeyesgoto:

http://www.topsecretdatingadvice.com/getsexy/

Iwaiteduntilwehadfinishedourdrinks,soasnottoberude,andtoldtheguysweweremeetingfriendsandwantedtogofindthem.Assoonaswemoved,thetopicofconversationshiftedimmediatelytohowridiculouslythosemenhadacted.Wecouldnotbelievethatattractive,well-dressedmen,whowereobviouslysuccessful,werethatinsecure!

Whydidtheyfeeltheneedtobabbleonaboutwhattheyhadwhentheycouldhavejusttalkedtous?Trustme;atleasthalfofuswouldhavegonehomewithoneofthosemen.However,theytotallyruineditandturnedeachofusoff.

Abouttwohourslater,Iwasgettingdrinksfromthebarwhenamanapproachedme.Hewasabout56,waswearingglassesandIcouldseemyselfinhisheadfromfivefeetaway.NotattractivebutforsomereasonwhenhewalkedovertomeIfelttheenergythatIcanonlyexplainasmagnetic.

Hereshowthewholethingwentdown:

Hecameuptomeandsaid,Himynameisxxx,andheldouthishand.Iintroducedmyself.

X:Yourenotfromhereareyou?

Me:No.Howcanyoutell?

X:Becauseyouaretheonlygirlinthebarsmilingandlookingpeoplestraightintheeye.Girlslikethatdonotexistaroundhere.Whereareyoufrom?

Me:TorontoinCanada

X:IjustvisitedToronto.Greatcity,itslikeamuchcleanerversionofNewYork.Whatmadeyouwanttomovehere?

Theconversationwentonforsometimeandthatexcitedfeelinginmystomachkeptincreasing.Hewasinteresting,confidentandhadthiscomfortablewayabouthimthatintriguedmegreatly.WhenIlikeaguyIamtalkingto,Igetnervous,tripovermywordsandramble.Sometimesabouttopicsthathaveabsolutelynothingtodowiththeconversationathand.Luckyforme,guysseemtolikethat.

Ididnotnoticeanyoneelsearoundme.Iwastotallyintothisguy.

Itookasecondtothinkaboutit.Whatisitaboutthisbald,shortmaninglasseswhohasabsolutelynostylewhatsoever?ThenIrealizedwhatitwasthatIwasattractedto,hischaracter.Thisguywasinterestingandconfidentandobviously,amanwhowentafterwhathewanted.Hewaslight-hearted,didnottakethingstooseriously,anddidnotagreewitheverythingIsaid.

Helookedmestraightintheeyeandwentafterme,withoutadoubtinhismindthathemightberejected.Hedidnotapproachmewithsomecheesylineorroutine.HeapproachedmedirectlywithoutfearandIcouldsensethat.Hedidnotdominatetheconversation.Ifanything,Iwasdoingmostofthetalking.Thisinturnmademenervous.Iwastheonewhowasafraidofpossiblerejection.

IdidnotfeelatanytimethatIhadfullcontrolofthesituation.Ire-memberthinking,Doesthisguylikeme?AmIsoundingsmartenough?Istherelipstickonmyteeth?Mymouthhurtsfromsmiling.Inashortperiod,hemademefeelcomfortable,excited,andspecial.Icouldtellfromourconversationthatxxxwasagoodmananddesiredbyothers.Thisofcoursemademewanthimmore.

Hewasself-assured,calm,andcoolandcollected.Thisisthetypeofmanthatcreatesattraction.ThetypeofmanIwanttodateandbeinarelationshipwith.Aslongasyouaredirect,confident,andclearinyourwants,womenwillbeattractedtoyou.Themorecomfortableyouareinyourskin,themoreattractiveyouaretowomen.

Iamattractedtoaself-assuredmanwhoknowshimselfandknowswhathewants.This

attitudemakesmefeelspecialandluckytohavecapturedthismansattentionandmakesmewanttoseehimagain.Icantellyouthatxxxwasnotalwaysabletoapproachwomenwithsuchconfidence.Later,herevealedtomethatheusedtobeunsuccessfulwithwomenandwasafraidtoapproach.Heusedtothinkhewastooskinny,short,andunattractiveandittooktimetogrowintohislooks.

Afteryearsofworkingonhimself,hefeelscomfortableinhisownskinandcanapproachanyonewithoutfear.Youtoocanfeelexactlylikexxx.Everymancan!Youcanapproach,attract,date,andkeepthemostattractive,amazingwomen.

DoYouHaveThePresenceWomenWant?

Iamalwaystalkingaboutthepresenceofsomementhatmakeswomenfallheadoverheels.Awhileback,Ireceivedanemailfromoneofmyclientswhowantedmetoelaborateonjustwhattheheckpresencewasandwhyhedidnotyethaveit.BelowistheemailfromX.HereallygotmetodigdeepandIknowthisinformationistheexactinformationyouneedtounderstandwhatwomenwantfromaman.

QuestionfromX:

HeyMarni,

Iflooksdonotmatterthatmuchtowomen,whatisthepoint,orthedeed,orthekeyorwhatever,togetthewomantostoplookingatwhathelookslike,andstarttolikehimforwhoisinside?

Moreso,whatmustthemanbelike,actlikeordoinordertotakeattentionawayfromthewayhelooksandturnawomansattentiontohischaracter?

Whatwouldmakeyouforgetabouthowtheguylooksandlikehimforsomethinginside?

X

Answerfromme:

IamgoingtotrytobreakitdownforyouthebestwaythatIcan.Forme,yes,looksarewhatinitiallycatchmyeye.TheyarethefirstandonlythingIcanusetoevaluatewhetherIaminterested.However,looksarequicklyoverpoweredassoonasIstarttofeelamanscharacter.Thiscanhappeninamatterofsecondsoritmaytakeminutes.

IwantedtosharealittlestorywithyouthatmaybeabletohelpexplainwhatImeanwhenItalkaboutpresence.Theotherday,Iwaswithabestguyfriendofminewhohasalwaysbeengreatwithwomen.Someofourotherfriendsarealittlejealousofhisabilitiesandcreditittohismoney,car,orhome.

Asawoman,Iknowthathissuccesswithwomenhasnothingtodowithhisstatus.Honestly,hecouldbedirtpoorandbaldandwomenwouldstillbesuperattractedtohim.Infact,theywerebackwhenhehadnothing.Thereasonwhywomenareattractedtohimishiscalmdemeanor,confidence,andenjoymentoflife.Heiseasytobearound,

interestingandhashisownpointofviewbutisintriguedbywhatothershavetosay.

Myfriendknowsheisawesome.Notinanarrogantway,butinahumbleway.Iknowwhatyouwerelookingforwasamoremagicalanswerthanthisbutthatisreallythesecret.Nowthehardpartisgettingtoaplaceofbelievingthisaboutyourselfandfeelingthatsamecalmnessandcomfort.

ImaynotbeabletogiveyouamagicpillthatwillgetyouthatinstantlybutIcantellyouhowtogetit.Thistypeofcharacterisbuiltfrompractice,experience,andinformation.Itcomesfromobserving,peoplebutmoreimportantlyfromrecognizingyourself.IdonotwanttosoundlikeaspiritualgururightnowbutIhopeyouseewhereIamgoingwiththis.

Myguyfriendhasbeenintherapysincehewas12.Hewasconstantlyevaluatinghimselfwiththeassistanceofanotherperson.Thisallowedhimtofacehisgreatestfears,learntocontrolhisanxietyandcomeoutontheothersideasamanofvalue.Thereasonhehasthisvalueforhimselfisthathehasworkedatitandearnedit.Hegiveshimselfpermissiontogoafterwhathewantsandbelievesthathewillgetit.Ifhedoesnt,thenthatisokaytoo.Therewillalwaysbeotheropportunities.

Youcanhavethispresenceifyouwantit!

Marni

Whenamanapproachesme,Iofcourseevaluatehimonhislooks.AsIsaidbefore,Ihavenothingelsetogoby.Thensomethinginterestinghappens.AsIgetabettersenseofhischaracter,hisfacestartstomorph.Sometimesitcangetbetterlookingandsometimesitcanbecomehideous.

AshappenedwithXwhenheapproachedmewithsuretyandconfidencedespitehisappearance,myattractiongrowsbasedsolelyonsomeonescharacterandpersonality.IhopewhatyoutookawayfromthisemailexchangewithXisthattheonlypersonholdingyoubackfromgettingeverythingyouwantisyou.Themoreyoupushyourselftotakechancesthemoreconfidenceyouwillgainandmoreopportunitieswithwomenwillappear.

YouMustTurnYourselfonBeforeYouCanTurnaWomanOn

Thismangetswhatturnsawomanon!Asawoman,Ifeltattractionforhimjustreadingwhathewrote.Thatshowpowerfulitis.

EmailfromM:

DearMarni,

Iwanttothankyouforallofyourwonderfuladvice.IhavebeensubscribedtoyournewsletterforthepastcoupleofmonthsandcandefinitelysaythatIhaveseenanimprovementinmyinteractionswithwomen.IthinkthatthefemaleperspectiveyouprovidedoeswondersthatnoothermalePUAscanimitate.IthinkIreallyunderstandwhatyouaretryingtogetusguystorealizethatwehavetolikeourselvesbeforeawoman

can.Guyshavetoapproacheverysituationknowingtheyareworthitandifagirlrejectsthem,thensheisjustmissingoutonbeingwithagreatguy.Iliketothinkofitasfollows:Iamagreatguywhoisinaboatgoingdownariver.Ontheriverbanks,therearetonsofwomenandeverynowandthen,Istopandofferoneofthemthechancetogetonboardtheboatwithme.Iftheydo,great!Iftheydonot,thenthereisjustanothergirlfurtherdowntheriverthatwillgetonboardandhaveagreattimewithme.

IfindthatsinceIadoptedthismindset,girlshavelookedatmedifferently,givingmemoreattention,andallowingmetoenjoyflirtingmore.Itsasiftheyneedtogetonboardthatboatwithmeorelsesomeothergirlwilltaketheirplace.

Thankyouforallowingmetorealizethis,Marni.

M

Again,thishonestlyturnedmeonjustreadingit.Tofeellikethisinyourgut,youhavetogetoutthere.Youhavetopushyourself,takerisks,interactwithwomen,berejected,andlaugh,gainexperience.Itallstartswithone-step,sogetoffyourbuttandstartinteractingwithwomen.

WhyConfidenceIsMoreAttractiveThanaSix-PackandCash

WhenIcreatedmyprogram,HowtoBecomeaManWomenWant,Ipolledhundredsofwomenandaskedthemwhattheyfoundmostattractive.Doyouknowwhat95%ofthemsaid?

Confidence.

Looksarewaydownonthelist.Whyisconfidencesoattractivetowomen?Whatisitaboutaconfidentmanthatturnsusonsomuch?Iwilltellyou.

1Aconfidentmandoesnotneedawoman;hewantsawoman.Menwhoareneedyareveryunattractiveandwomencaninstantlyfeelitwhenamanisneedy.

2Aconfidentmanisproudofwhoheisandunderstandshisvalue.Ifyoudonotthinkyouaregoodenoughhowwillshethinkyouare?

3Aconfidentmaniscomfortableatalltimes.Whenyouinteractwithawomanandyougetuncomfortableyoustopyourselffromconnectingwithher.Howcanawomanbeintoyouifshedoesnotfeelaconnection?

4Aconfidentmanmakesawomanfeelsafeandsecure.

5Aconfidentmanisamasculineman.Ifyouapproachawomanwithoutconfidence,expectinghertostepintothedominantmaleroleandleadtheapproach,shewillfeelmoremasculinethanyouwill,andallattractionwillbelost.Womenwanttofeelfemininenotmasculine.Themorefeminineyouallowawomantofeelthemoreattractedtoyoushewillbe.

Thereareamillionmorereasonswhyconfidenceisthemostattractivecharacteristictowomen.Soasaman,howcanyoubuildthisconfidence?Howdoyouevenstart?Lucky

foryouIhavetheanswertobothquestionshere.

IpickedupafamouswomensmagazinecalledGlamour.Itsagreatwayformetokeepintouchwithrecentfemaletrends,wants,anddesires.Therewasagreatarticleintheissuecalled,YourGet-ConfidentKickStartwrittenbyVickiNorton(Norton,2012).Thearticleteachesreadershowtobuildconfidence.Eventhoughthisarticlewastargetedatwomen,Vickislessonsapplytomenaswell.

Infact,alotoftheadviceisquitesimilartotheadviceIgivemyprivatecoachingclients.Iwanttosharethehighlightswithyou.Eachoftheselittletipsareeasytoabsorbandabitmorechallengingtoapply,butifyoudoIguaranteethatwithinthreemonthstimeyouwillhavetheconfidenceeverywomanisattractedto.

Peoplewhooozeconfidencearepreparedtotakeariskanddotheirbest.Itsokaytoacknowledgethatyoudontfeelconfidentallthetime,butifyoudecidetodoallthethingsyouwanttodoanyway,yourconfidencewillgrow.

DR.CECILIADFELICE

Rememberpeoplewhoappeartobe100%confidentareoftenovercompensatingforinsecuritiesandputtingupaprotectivefacade.Togainsomeground,putyourselfoutthereandintosituationswhereyoumightinitiallyfeeloutofyourcomfortzone-thenyoullrealizeyoucanchange.

DR.ANNASYMONDS

Weknowyourlackofconfidenceisallyourmother/father/brother/teacher/boss/exsfaultbutgetoverit.Byblamingthemforyourinadequacies,youallowotherpeopletocontrolyourdestiny.Tomoveforwardandbethepersonyouwanttobe,thefirstlessonisthatshynessandlowself-esteemareoptional,notfixed.

DR.JAMES

Practice,practice,practice!AccordingtoDr.RussHarristherearefivefactorsleadingtolowself-confidence:harshself-judgment,excessiveexpectations,preoccupationwithfearandanxiety,lackofskills,inadequateexperience.Practicingyourskills(pickingup,talkingto,orapproachingwomen)andgainingexperienceareessential.

Feelthefear.

Thegoldenrulefordevelopinggenuineconfidenceisthis:theactionsofconfidencecomefirst,thefeelingscomelater.

DR.HARRIS

Snapoutofit.

Realizethateveryoneissobusyworryingaboutthemselves,theyrejustnotthatinterestedinhowyourecomingacross.

DR.SYMONDS

Takeitstepbystep.Setgoalsandsplitthemupintomanageablestages.

DR.DFELICE

ConfidenceisnotamagicformulathatyoucanstumbleuponinabookorontheInternet.Youmustworktoattainitbutwhenyoudo,itwillgiveyoueverythingyouneedtowalkuptoawomanandbeyourself.

FourThingsYouNeedToDoToGetWomen

AtthebeginningofeveryNewYear,Isentoutaremindermessagetoeveryonethatfollowsmyblogandreadsmynewsletters.ItismyvirtualKickintheAssmotivator.EveryyearIwanttochangeitbuteveryyearIrealizethatwhatmenneedtogetwomendoesnotchangeallthatoften.Itisapermanentthing.

IwanttosharethatannualletterherebecauseitisjustaspoignantnowasitwouldbeinJanuary:

1BeaLeader,NotaFollower.Iknowitiseasiertobethelaidbackguybutitiscertainlynotattractive.Bedecisiveineverythingthatyoudo.Evenifyoudonothaveanopinion,formoneandtakeittoaction.Forexample,X,whatdoyouwanttodotonight?Yourtypicalanswer:Doesntmattertome,whateveryoulike.Newanswer:LetsgotothisnewWhiskeybarIheardabout.

2GetaLife.Womenaremoreattractedtomenthathavelivesoftheirown.Why?Becauseitmeanstheyarenotasneedy.

3StateYourIntentions.Itistimeforhonesty-Nomorecoveringupyourintentionsandsuppressingyourmasculineurges.Ifyouseeawomanyoufindattractive,gogetherandletherknowwhatyouwant.Moreover,whatdoyouwant?Youwanttoknowwhethersheisagoodfitforyou.Whetherithastodate,havesex,formapartnership,buildafriendshiporwhatever.Youwillneverfindoutunlessyouareclearwithyourintentions.

4BeDirect.Thereisnothingsexierthanamanwhoisdirect.Bedirectandaskforwhatyouwant.ThinkofhowyouaskedforgiftsfromSantawhenyouwereyounger.YouaskedforwhatyouwantedIwantaBBgun,IwantaNintendo,andIwantaG.I.Joe.ThenitwasuptoSantatosayyesorno.Theonlywaytogetwhatyouwantisbyaskingforit.Iguaranteethatifyoustartdoingthesefourthings,youwillgetwhatyouwantwithwomen!

ThreeThingsWomenFindSexyThatHaveNothingtoDoWithSex

Believeitornot,someofthesexiestthingsyoucandototurnawomanonhappenoutsidethebedroom.Belowisanemailfromoneofmyclients.Togetherwehavetakenhimfromapouncingpleasertoanattractiveoptiontowomen.Hesentmeanemailtodaylistingthediscoverieshehasmadeoverthelastyear.Henowlivesbywhatheshareshere:

Email:

HeyMarni,

IshouldprefacethisbysayingthatIamnotperfect.Istillmakemistakes,sometimesscrewup,andendintheFriendZone.However,thesearemydiscoveries

1.PassionforLife.Youhavetobelivingalifethatyoufeelpassion-ateabout.Atsomepointsheisgoingtowanttoknowaboutyou,andyouareingoodshapethereifyouhavesomecoolstoriesofyourowntosharewithher.

DoingaerialandCrossfitandlearningtosurfwasterrificasfarashelpingmemeetwomen,notsomuchduetomeetingwomenattheseplaces,butmorebecauseitgavemesomethinggreattotalkaboutwhenIdidgoondates.

Astatementthatalwaysseemstoturnonwomen,Ireallywanttotry(worthwhilegoal),andsoIhavebeen(preparingforworthwhilegoal).

2.Self-Control.Thistakesonabunchofdifferentformsbuthereareafewthatmeanthemosttome.Youcannotbeinanyrushtosharethesestories.Lethertalk,andthenyoucanshare.Youwillnotonlylookcourteous,butitisalsosmart.Thelessyoutalk,thelesslikelyyouwillendupstickingyourfootinyourmouth!Ifsheneverdoesaskyouaboutyourlife,thenthatisagoodsignthatsheisnotsomeoneyouwanttogetinvolvedwith.

Youhavetobecomfortablewithcarryingyourendoftheconversationandlethercarryherend.Thismeansthatyoucannotbesoquicktofillinthesilences.Lettherebepauses.Youhavetolearnhownottobecomefazedifshetellsyousomethingthatisimpressiveorintimidatingsuchas,IplayedprofessionalbeachvolleyballandnowImodel,or,IrunmyownbusinessandhavesomuchmoneyIneverhavetoworkagain.Genuineappreciationishot.However,beverycarefulaboutgivingtoomanycompliments!Theironyisthatthemoreofthemyougivepastthefirstone,thelessgenuinetheyactuallylook.Ontheonehand,wewanttomakethegirlfeelcomfortable,butontheotherhand,wewantthegirltoinvestintheinteractiontoo,andworryjustalittlebithowsheiscomingacross.

3.Self-awareness.Theabilitytocheckin,seehowyouarefeeling,andseewhatisreallygoingon.Imfeelingunsettledbecausetheconversationdoesnotseemtobegoinganywheregood.WhenIaskedheraperfectlynicequestionaboutherjob,shejustseemstobecomplaining.Okay,itsherproblem.Letsseewhatwecandototurnthisaround.Or,Imfeelingnervousrightnow,andsoIfeelanurgetotalk.Imgoingtoholdmytongueforacoupleofsecondsatleastandseewhathappens.

Iknowtherearemore.Theseareminefornow!

Mike

Thesethreethingsareessential,notonlyforwomen,butalsoforyouasaman.IttookawhileforMiketograsptheseconcepts,butnowthathehas,theworldofwomenishisforthetaking!

RealMenTakeRisks

Forhundredsofthousandsofyearsofhumandevelopment,aconfidentattitudewasmucheasierformentogainanddisplaythanitisnowbecauseitwasrequiredforsurvival.Therewashardlyanychoice.Untilrecently,thedemandsofphysicalsurvivalweretheprimaryissueinpairbondingandconfidence-buildingrolesforbothsexesdirectlyrelatedtosurvivalwerefarmoreapparent.Iamnottalkingaboutsurvivalinextraordinarycircumstances,either.Itcouldbeasbasicassteadfastnessingettingthecropsinoutoftherain.

DANAPEACH

WhatIreadfromthisisthatconfidencewasmucheasiertogaininthepast.Menwereconstantlyfacedwithpotentialrisk;riskofnoteating,riskofbeingattacked,riskofdisease.Thelistgoeson.Everyday,therewasalargeorsmallriskthateverymanfacedtosurvive.Todaysmanfacesnorisksorchallenges,unlesstheyareself-imposed.Hecanbesafe,comfortable,andshelteredfromharmswayifhesochooses.Sadly,manymenmakethischoice.

Mychallengetoyouistoincorporateasmallriskintoyourlifeeveryday.Hereafewtogetyoustarted:

1Smileatfivestrangerstoday.

2Approachanywomanyoufindattractive,sayHi.Thenleaveifyouwant.Theriskismerelytheapproach.

3Askoutthewomanyouhavebeenputtingoffaskingout.

Forthenextfivedays,taketheserisks.Ifyouhaveahardtimerememberingtotaketheserisks,puttheminyourcalendarorwritethemdownonaPost-Itandplaceitonyourcomputerscreen.Whateveryouneedtodotoremembertotaketheserisks,doit.Ifyoudonot,youcannotgrow.Ifyoudonotgrow,youwillnotgainmoreconfidence.Ifyoudonotgainmoreconfidence,youcanneverbecomeamanthatwomenwant.

Ichallengeyoutotakethesesmallriskseveryday.Ipromisethatifyoudo,youwillbecomeamanwomenwant.Moreimportantly,youwillgainmoreconfidenceandthecharacteryouhavewantedforalongtime.

RulesforAttractingBeautifulWomen

Ihaveanexerciseforyou.Itrequiresminimumeffortandwillcreatemaximumresults.Ready?Iwantyoutoknowwhatitisliketowalkinawomansshoes.No,IamnotgoingtomakeyouputonapairofheelsbutIamgoingtoshowyouwhatbeautifulwomenexperiencewithmeneveryday.

Youaregoingtoseeitallfromawomanspointofview.Ihopethatthisexercisewillgiveyouanewperspectiveonwhatwomendealwithonadailybasisandhowyoucanchangetogetwhatyouwant.Sothatyoucanseethetinyerrorsandmistakesyoumakethataresilentlykillingyourchancesofattracting,dating,andgettingincrediblyamazingandbeautifulwomen,hereisyourassignment.

Yourassignmentistocreateanonlinedatingprofileasawoman.Pickadatingsite,makeyourprofile,andpostacouplepicturesofasexywoman(findsomeontheInternet;trustme,theresplenty.)Nowwaitfortheresponsesthatyouget.

Oneofmyclientswrotetomeafterdoingtheexercise:

Email:

Marni,

IsigneduponadatingsiteasawomanandIhavelearnedthatdudesarelame.Inlessthanaday,Ihavereceived11pagesofe-mails,mostofwhichhaveHiasthesubject.Themessageitselfisusuallysomethingalongthelinesof,Yourepretty,pleasetalktome.IusedsomephotosthatIfoundonline(lotsofinterestingsitespopupwhenyouGooglehotbabe).

Inafewofthemessages,theguyswerenotsosubtlybraggingaboutonethingoranother.Alternatively,theyjusthitmewithabarrageofquestions.Ididntrealizehowpatheticmostguysare.Isthiswhatitislikeforwomeninreallifeto?IamalmoststartingtofeellikeIwouldbedoingwomenafavorbyapproachingthem.

Dave

Myresponse:

Dave,

Thereitis!Themagicrealization.Yes!Youwouldbedoingthemafavortosavethemfromthehorribleshittheyarebombardedwitheveryday.

Yes,womengetthatinreallife.

Yes,themoreattractiveawomanisthemorebullshitisthrownatherandthelowerqualitylevelofmanapproachesher.

Iamsogladthatyoustandtoseeitthroughawomanseyes.

Marni

HeresanotherresponseIgot:

HeyMarni,

Ijustwantedtosaythatthisexerciseisgenius!

Atfirst,apartofmefeltsomewhatbadforfuckingwithallthosedesperateguysafterpostingapicofaninsanelybeautifulgirl,butanotherpartofmejustwantedtolaughmyassoffatalltheredundant,mundanemessagesIgot.

Intheveryfirstday,thatIhadtheprofileon,Igot17messages.15outof17hadeither,Hi,Hey,or,Helloasthesubjectline.Areyoukiddingme?Thatisthebesttheycancomeupwith?

IthoughtthatwasbaduntilIreadtheactualmessages.Prettymuchallofthemsaidsomethingtothetuneofthis,Hey.Youarebeautiful.

Messagemebackandgettoknowme.Awomanwouldprobablypickupfromthisemailseveralthings.

Theguyhasnocreativity.Theguyisveryshallow.Ifthefirstthinghementionsisyourlooksthatisobviouslyallhereallycaresabout.Heisprobablyverydesperateastheemailissosimpleandboringthatheprobablysendsthesameexactemailtomultiplewomeneveryday.Ihavetoadmit,Iwasonceguiltyofthismyself.

Thanksagainfortheexercise.Itdefinitelyopenedmyeyes.Bytheway,Itooktheprofiledown.

Alex

Ihavegiventhisexercisetoover200menandeachofthemhavehadthesameresponse.Theywereshockedathowwomenwerebombardedbypatheticlosers.Youcanimaginewhywomenhavedevelopedtheirownbarriersforentryandwhyitisevenmorechallengingforgreatmentobreakthroughthebarriers.Tryit.Learnfromit.Changeyourperspectivebecauseofit.SomethingtellsmeIamabouttogetinalotoftroublefromdatingsitesbutitisworthit.

WomenWantaStrongMan

Idebatedtheplacementofthisemailexchangeforafewdays.Infact,Iprobablymoveditaroundfromchaptertochapteroveradozentimes.ThereasonIdidthiswasthattheemailbelowisfromamanaskingtogethisgirlfriendback.Thiscomeswayafterunderstandingthetypeofmanwomenwant.

However,atitscore,thequestionisreallyaboutthetypeofmanwomenwantandhowthisguycanbecomethatman.Therefore,IstuckitattheendofthefirstchapterbecauseIfeelittrulyexplainswhatallwomenwant.

ThehonesttoGodtruthaboutwhatwomenwantiseverythingandnothingallatthesametime.Wedonotknowwhatwewant.Wemaythinkwedo,butusuallyweare

wrong.Afteralmostadecadeofworkingwithmentoexplaintheultimatemysterythatiswomen,Ihaverealizedwhatwomentrulywant,eveniftheydonotknowtheydo.

Whatwomentrulywantisaman.Amanthatcanleadustowardswhatwewantfromlife.Notbybeinganaggressive,arrogantjerkbutbyremainingstrong,confident,andcomfortablenomatterwhatwethrowtheirway.Aman,whogetsus,understandsus,leadsus,andcanstaygroundedinourmomentsofconfusion.Thatisamananywomanwouldhappilybeattachedto,andfeelsatisfiedthatsheisgettingeverythingsheeverwantedfromandmore.

Nowthatwegotthatoutoftheway,Iwanttoshareanemailexchangewithaguywhosegirlfriendbrokeupwithhimfornotbeingaman.Seeingashehasapenis,Icanunderstandhisconfusionwithherstatement.

Above,Itoldyouwhatwomenwantandnow,throughmyemailcorrespondencewithC,Iamgoingtoshowyouwhatexactlythatlookslike.

Hereshowtobethestrongmanwomenwant.

Email:

Marni,

MygirlfriendandIjustbrokeuptwoweeksago.Well,shebrokeupwithmemainlyfornotbeingaman.Notinbed(oursexwasalwaysamazing,andIknowitwasforherto),butfornotbeingamanintheotherareasofmylife.TheshortversionofthestoryisthatIhadbeenlazy,withoutajobcollectingunemploymentandnottakingmyownlifeseriously.Iendedupbeingevicted,andhadtostaywithherforthelasttwomonthsandeventhoughIhadalreadystartedtogetmyshittogether,thedamagewasalreadydone,andmyactionswerenotfastenoughforher,andItotallyagree.Igottheboot.

NowIalwaystoldherthatifshereallylovedmeatmylowestpointinmylife,shewasreallygoingtobecrazyaboutmeatmybest.Ihavealwaysbeenfairlysuccessfulathavingmyshittogether(beforeImether),butforthelastthreeyearsIwentsomewhere(mentally)IswearIwillnevergobackto.Ididntevenrecognizemyself.So,shewaited,waited,andwatchedasImovedtowardsmygoalsataveryslowspeed.Forayearandahalf,thiswenton.Iamsurprisedshelastedthatlongwithme.IknowIwouldnothaveputupwithitifIwereinhershoes.

Havingsaidthat,mylifeisfinallyturningaround.Ihavemyownplace,Iamstartinganewjobnextweek,andmynewbusinessisfinallygeneratingsomerevenue.NowthatIpurchasedyourprograms,IknowImonmywaytobecomethemaneverywomanwantsandIwanttostartusingthisknowledgeonherbecauseIknowthatoncesheseesthenewmeshesgoingtofeeldifferenttowardsme.

Iwantasecondchancenotsomuchattherelationship,butatus.Iwanthertoseetherealmeplusallthisknowledgeandtodatehernon-exclusivelyandseewhereitgoesfromthere.IknowwestillloveeachotherverymuchbutIwasactingabitneedyandclingytowardstheend,whichIknow,turnedheroff.

Whenshebrokeupwithme,shetoldmethattheonlytimeshefeltaconnectionwas

whenwewerehavingsex.Afterreadingsomeofyourmaterial,Icanseethatcrystalclearnow.Wehadbeentalking(beforewebrokeup)abouthowwecouldnotwaittowatchtheRoastofCharlieSheen,whichisthiscomingMonday.Wehavenotspokentoeachotherforaweeknow.

Iwantedtotexthertomorroworthenextday,inviteherover,andcookcrablegssincethatisourfavoritemeal.Ihaveafeelingshewillsayyes(atleastforthesex),ifIplayitright.Iwasgoingtotexther:Hey,theRoastofCharlieSheenisMonday.WhydontIpickyouupandwewillwatchitatmyplace?ThinkingofhavingsomeCajun&garliccrablegsfordinner.

Idontknowwhattodo.ShouldIevenbother?IdowanthertoseemeforthemanIoncewasandthenewmanIambecoming.Thankyouverymuch!Youaretheshitforhelpingmenlikemeinthisarea.

Carlos

Myresponse:

Carlos,

Thankyouforbeingsohonestwithme.IhaveagoodpictureofwhathashappenedwithyourexandIhaveafewsuggestionsonhowtomoveforward.

Ithinkthereissomeemotionalworkthatneedstobedoneherebeforeinvitingheroverfortheroast.FromwhatIcantell,sheiswaitingtohearthatthingshavechanged,thatyouroutlookhasalteredandthatyouloveyourselfalmostasmuchasshedid.Forawoman,feelingthatyouhaveinvestedpoorlycanbeoneofthemostdamagingandheartwrenchingthingstoexperience.

Iwouldloveforyoutotalktoherabouteverythingthatyouareworkingon.Thethingsyouaredoingtobetteryourlifeandbetteryourself.Iknowyoumaythinkeithersheknowsthesethingsorthatyouhavetoldher.Iwantyoutoletherknowdefinitelythatyouunderstandshebrokeupwithyoubecauseyouwerenotbeingastrongman.Ittookherleavingforyoutoseeitandnowthatyoudo,youareworkingoncreatingatrulygreatself.

Hereismyadvice:emailorinviteheroverfortheroast,andwhenthenightisalmostover,tellher.However,youmustremembertostaypositive,strongandmostimportantly,Iwantyoutoconveythatyouaredoingthisforyourself,butthatsheinspiredit.

Ifyouleaveallofthisunspoken,itwilltakealotlongertogetbacktogether.Ifyouarehonest,positiveandshowyouhaveconfidence,thegettingbacktogetherprocesswillbealotquicker.Overall-thisgirlwantstoseethatyouwillnotgobacktothatdarkplace.Inthatdarkplaceshelovedyou,butwasnotattractedtoyou.Thatisnotagoodplaceforarelationship.

Marni

Hisresponse:

HelloMarni,

Thankyouverymuchforyourquickresponse.Ithelpedmeouttremendously.Iinvitedherovertowatchtheroastandshegladlyaccepted.InsteadofmetellingherwhatIwantedtosay,Iwroteheraletterandgaveittohertowardstheendofthenight.Notverymanly,butIwantedtomakesureIdidntforgetanythingandIknewweweregoingtobedrinkingwineandifIhadwaitedtotellherwhenthenightwasalmostover,Iprobablywouldhavegottenabittooemotional,maybeforgottensomethingandsheprobablywouldhavebeentoodrunktoremember.Sheputitaway,spentthenightherewithme,anddidntreadituntiltoday.

(Iincludedacopyoftheletterinthisemail.AnyinputyoucouldgivemeonhowdifferentIshouldhavesaidanythingwouldbegreatlyappreciatedsoIcanlearnfrommymistakes).

Thewholenightwasalotoffunfilledwithlotsofgreatsex,laughs,food,andsomehottubaction.Moreimportantly,Iwasactinglikeatotalmanthistimereallylisteningtowhatshewassaying,lookingatherintheeyesandIusedthewordbecausemanytimeswhenIwastellingherastory.IalsotookmytimebeforeIwentforthefirsthugsandkissesofthenightandwhenIdid,shewasallovermewithsparksinhereyes.Before,IusedtobealwaysalloverherrightawaysoIknowshesawafewthingsthatweredifferentaboutme.

SoIwenttoherplacelaterontodaytodropoffamakeuppurseandashirtshelefthere(hercarisnotworkingthatswhyIwentthereinsteadofherpickingthemupherself).WhenIwasthere,shegavemeahugandkissedme.IsensedsomethingandIaskedherifshewasokaytowhichshesaid:

Her:Yourletterblewmeaway!

Me:Why?

Her:ThatwasexactlywhatIvewantedtohear,notforme,butforyou.

Me:Yeah

Her:YouknowIloveyou,right?

Me:Iknow.YouknowIloveyoutoo,right?

Her:Yeah

Wekissedandhuggedliketheolddays.Igotuptoleaveandwewalkedouttogetherbecauseshewasleavingtoo.Thereagainwekissedagainlikeolddays.Itwasverypassionate.Lateronshetextme,Thanksforeverything.Ihadanawesometime.Ireplied30minuteslaterwith,Yourewelcome.Ienjoyedittoo.NormallyIwouldhaverespondedrightawaywithamoreenthusiasticresponsebutIwantedtocontinuethenewtoneandnotgooverthetop.

Doingthatfeltgood.Wehavebeentextingbackandforthforthelastseveralhourstalkingaboutherworkmostly.Ihavebeentakingmytimeresponding,givingheralotshorterresponsesthanIusedtoandbasicallylettingherdo75%ofthetalkingbutstillleadingtheconversation.Ifeelverygoodabouthowthisisgoing,butIhavetocontinue

takinggoodcareofmyselfandnotputherbeforeme(whichishardforme).Iamnotgoingtodothateveragain.

Thankyouverymuch.Youareagenius!

Carlos

Icansaythisamilliontimesinamilliondifferentwaysbutmenarealwaysgoingtorolltheireyesatme.Heregoes.Womendonotcareifyouarerichorsuperattractiveorhaveabsofsteel.Atthecore,wereallydonotcareaboutanyofthat.Thosearebonuses.Whatwewantisamanwhoisgrounded,comfortableinhisownskinandcanbestrong.

IhaveaddedCarlosemailsothatyoucanseehowperfectlyheexpressedhimself.Heexpressedhisemotionstohisexwithoutbecomingemotional.Onlyastrongmancantrulydothis.

EmailfromCarlos:

WhyWomenLike50ShadesofGrey

Ijustfinishedreading50ShadesofGreyandmylibidoispumping!Itotallygetwhatallthefussisabout.Ifyouhaventseenawomanreading50ShadesofGreyyet,wherehaveyoubeen?Womenareflickingthroughthisthingoverlunch,browsingitonthesubway,andreadingitaloudattheirbookclubs.Theyarewildlyturnedonbythissimplepieceoffiction.50ShadesofGreyexploreswomenssexualfantasies.Itisabookaboutsex,eroticaliterature,andithastheentirefemalepopulationmesmerized.Ihighlysuggestyougetyourselfacopyasitisadirectinsightintothefemalelibido!

Beforeyourushtothestoretopickupacopy,Iwantedtosharemythoughtsonitwithyou.BecauseIfeelthisisonebook,whereyouneedawomansopiniontoguideyouthroughthehiddendetailsinitastowhatwomenfindsoattractive,asitmaynotbewhatyouthink!

Idonotwantyoutoreadthisbookwithyourmasculinegoggleson.Iwantyoutoseeitfromawomanspointofview.Becauseonceyoudo,youwillhaveunlockedthesecrettoeverywomanshiddenfantasies,andbeabletoseduceanywomanyouwant.

Heresthebadnews:notallwomenwanttobechainedup,spanked,orblindfolded.Donotthink,OhthatswhatIhavetodo,stringawomanupinropesanduseherasmysexslavebecausethatsobviouslywhatallwomensecretlywant.Remember,thebookisfiction,andtherelationshipisexaggerated.

However,whileyoumaynotbea27-year-oldbillionairewithahelicopterthereareafewvaluablelessonsyoucanlearnaboutwhatwomenwantthatIwantyoutonotice.ManyguysreadingthisbookwillassumethatthereasonAnaSteeleissointerestedinChristianGreyisthatheisyoung,goodlooking,andrich.

Nevertheless,thefemalereaderscannotactuallyseeChristianGrey;theycannottakearideinhishelicopter.Whatreallyengagesthem,whatreallyturnsthemon,alloccurswithinthemind.Thereisnotactuallyanysexuntilwaybeyond100pagesin!

Whatdoesthattellyou?

Thatsexualtension,forwomen,isinthementalanticipationofwhatmighthappen.Itishernotknowingifshecancontrolherself,andhowheisgoingtoseduceher.Itisnotaboutjumpingrightintothewhipsandthechains:itisaboutAnafeelinglikeChristianreallywantsher,andbuildingupherexpectations.Christianfrequentlysaysthingslike,IfIwanttoIwillHeisleadinghisownlifeandvision,andwomenlovethat!Nowyoucanusesomethingsimilar:trytellingawomanthatyouwanthertocheckoutarestaurantorabandyouthinkshewilllove.Thisissomuchbetterthanspeakinginaweaker,lesscertainway.

BeingdirectisnottheonlythingthatmakesChristianGreyattractivethough:healsomakesAnatrusthim;heshowsherthatbeneathhissuaveexteriorthereisvulnerability.Hementionspasttraumasandattimes,themaskslips,heisnotasperfectlyincontrolasheinitiallymakesout.Ratherthanbeingaturn-off,thismakeshimmoreattractivetoAna.Shefeelslikeheissincere,heispassionateandthatthereissomethingdeeperhappening,thatheisinlovewithonlyher.

Heshowsthathisentireattentionisonherandfrequentlytells,Youaremine.Inthe

book,thiscancomeacrossaspossessivebehavior,whichisnotattractive.However,Iwantyoutotakefromexperiencethatwomenliketofeeldesiredbymenthatamanisnotjustwithherbecausehehasnootheroptions,butbecausehetrulywantstobewithher.

Sowhenyouarereading50ShadesofGreyrememberthatitisaneroticfantasyandtoreadbetweenthelines.Womendonotwantyoutobeabillionaire,buttheydolikeamanwhohasauthorityandconfidence.Womendonotnecessarilywantamantodominatethem,buttheydowantaguytoadoptthemasculineroleandlead.Womendonotwantaguywhoownsthem,buttheywanttofeeldesiredandwanted.

Doyouknowwhatthebestlessonyoucantakefrom50ShadesofGreyis?Thatwomenlovesextoo,thattheywanttomeetmen,andthatthisbookhaswokenupthelibidoofthousandsandthousandsofwomenallaroundtheworld!

II.HowToApproachWomenIcantellwhenguysarecheckingmeout.WhenIcatchthem,theylookaway

whenwhattheyshoulddoissmileatme

WINGGIRLHEATHER

Morethan50%oftheearthspopulationisfemale,andvirtuallyallofthemareavailabletoyou,(withinareasonableandlegalagerange.)ThisisnotancientRome,pre-partitionIndia,ortheMonarchy.Whenitcomestodating,societyismoreliberalthanithaseverbeen.Thereisnocastesystem,therearemoreinterracialmarriagestodaythaneverbefore,gaymarriageislegal,andwecanfindloveatanyage,inanyplace.Whatdoesthistellyou?

Youhavemoreoptionsthaneverbefore.Youhavethefreedomtochoosesomeoneyoureallywant.Youhaveallthetimeintheworldtodoitin.

Inthischapter,Iwilltellyouwheretofindtheoneyouwant,howtoapproachher,andhowtodealwithrejection.Yes,therewillbelotsofit.Womenareeverywhere.Thisshouldbefun.

TheWhereandHow:

WheretoMeetWomen

Thinktherearenowomeninyourtown,yourstate,yourcountry?Youaresinglebecausetherejustarenotanywomen,right?Idontthinkso.Oneofthemostcommonhurdlesguystellmethattheyfaceisthattheydontknowwheretofindwomen!Iwanttogiveyouaninsightintohowtoovercomethissothatyouknowthatnotmeetingwomenisreallyduetoyourmindsetandnottherealityofthesituation.

YoumaynotliveonBroadway,NYC,orSouthBeach,MIA,orHollywood,CA,butherearemytopplacestomeetwomeninyourlocalarea:

TheMall:Withoutmakinganyjokesabouthowmuchwomenliketoshop;oneofthekeyplacestomeetwomeniswheretheyhangoutduringtheday.Ifyouareattractedtosomeone,itisperfectlyoktostrikeupaconversationwhileyouaregoingaboutyourday-to-dayactivities.Sonexttimeyouseeacutewomanshoppingforsomegroceries,buyingacoffee,orwindowshopping,approach,approach,approach.Unlessyougoandsay,Hi,youwillneverknow!

TheGym:Youarekillingtwobirdswithonestonehere;gettingfitandmeetingwomen!Iknowyoumaythinkthatwomendonotwanttobebotheredatthegym,andthisissomewhattrue,butitisagreatplacetoslowlybuildrapportwithwomenandmakeconnections.Overtheyears,IhavedatedsevenguysthatImetatthegym.Onewasmytrainerbuttheotherswereguyswhojustwenttothesamegymasme.

SocialClubs:Oncewomenhaveleftcollege(andgainedsomeresponsibilities)grindingatadanceclubuntil3amlosessomeofitsappeal!However,thereareplentyofother

socialopportunities.Ifyouliveinacity,checkoutnetworkingevents;oftentheselistattendees,includingsinglewomen.Ifyoulivealittlefurtherout,thenlookintolocalsocialclubs,bookclubs,yogaclubs,etc.

ExploreYourHobbies:Haveyoualwayswantedtolearnafewskillsinthekitchen?Tryoutrockclimbing,orfinallymakethetriptoseeyourfavoritebandplay?Thendoit!Notonlywillyoubuildupyourownsociallife(whichinstantlymakesyoumoreofaninterestingguytobearound)butyouwillalsoendupmeetingwomenwhohaveasharedinterestwithyou:greatforkick-startingconversations!

GetOnline:Eveniftherewasntawomanforhundredsofmilesaround,thefactthatyouarereadingthismeansyouhaveaccesstotheInternet.Sogetonline,tryoutafewfreesites,putsomeeffortintogettingagoodprofiletogether,andwhipoutthoseicebreakermessages.Justlikeinreallife,Internetdatingrequiresyoutobepro-active,butitcanbeagreatwaytomeettonsofpeopleyoumightotherwiseneverrunintoinreallife.

AskYourFriends:Mostpeoplestillmeetpeoplethroughtheirsocialcircle,soitistimetoworkonyours.Agroupofgoodfriendswillgetyouoffyourcouchandoutmeetingpeople.Thebiggeryoursocialcircleis,themorepeopleyoucanmeetwhoareafriendofafriendofafriend.Sostartsayingyeswhenpeopleinviteyouout,arrangecoolsocialgatheringsandtellallyourfriendstoplaymatchmaker!

TheGroceryStore:IthinkIhaveofficiallyincreasedrevenuesatWholeFoodsandotherlocalsupermarketsaroundtheworld,becauseItelleveryguyIworkwithtogopracticemeetingwomenatthegrocerystore.Itworkssowellanditisagreatplacetomeetwomen.Inaddition,ithasmanyconversationstartersbecausethereismuchtoobserve:YouhavealotofsweetpotatoesorIveneverhadthattypeoffishbefore,whatdoesittastelike?Plentyofwaystobreakintoconversations.

Google!Googleisthebestresourceforfindingevents,groups,andactivitiesyoucanparticipateinsothatyoucanmeetwomen.Iactuallyuseitformostofmyone-on-oneclients.

Hereshowtouseit:

Enteryourageoragerangeyouarelookingtomeet/interactwith.Entersinglesevents/singlesgroups/singlesparties.Enteryourcity(seeexamplebelow.)

Awholebunchofoptionswillpopup.Thengothroughtheoptionsandfindthebestchoicesforyou.MakesuretodooneofthesethingseachweekandIguaranteeyouwillmeetwomenornewsinglefriendsthatyoucanhangoutwith.Nomorebeingthethirdwheel!Younowhavealistofeightwaystofindplacestomeetwomen!Sonomoreexcuses,itistimetogetoffyourbuttandmakeithappen!

HowtoMeetWomenWhileTravelling

Marni,

Givemealittleadvice.Ihaveahardtimemeetingwomenasmyjobisontheroad.ThismeansIamtravelingallthetimeandlivinginhotels.Myquestionisabouthowtomeetwomenwhiletravelingalone.

Jason,34,Chicago

Myresponse:

Jason,

Travelingforworkcanbeabitchonyoursociallife.Itrequiresextraeffortandpossiblysomerisktakingonyourpart.Ifyouareupforit,andIhopeyouare,Ihavefivestepsonhowtomeetwomenwhiletravelingalonebelow:

Step1:Beforegoingtoanycity,doyourresearch.Choosethebesthotellocationforgoingoutandbeingsocial.Youdonotwanttobestuckoutinthebooniesifyouplantobesocialandmeetwomenwhiletravelingforwork.

Tip:Mostcitieshavewebsitessetuptotellyouwhatisgoingonsociallyforrestaurants,hotels,nightlifeetc.Findoneofthesesitesandselectthreethingsyouwouldwanttodowhileinthatcity.

Step2:Gotothelobbyorhotelbarandscoutforothersflyingsolo,male,orfemale,doesntmatter.Youarejustlookingforapartnertogooutwithatthispoint.Tellthemyouguysaregoingtogooutforafunnightandgivethem1oralloftheoptionsyouhadselected.Trustme,ifpeopleareatahotelbythemselves,eightoutof10timestheywillbeupforsomesortofinteractionandsocialouting.

Step3:Gotothesociallocation.

Note:Ifyouarenotintoclubs,donotgotoclubs.Ifyouare,go.Iusuallysuggestalocalbar.Theyaretypicallybusyandfilledwithpeoplewhoareupfornewexperiences.

Step4:Startinteractingwithothers.Ifyouhaveahardtimedoingthisyoucanintroducesomesortofgamebetweenyouandyournewfriend.Forexample,guesshername.Itsagamewhereyoubothguesswhichhalfofthealphabetthefirstletterofhernamefalls.Ifyouareright,yougetabeerandviceversa.Thisgameismeanttogetyouinafunmoodandgivesyouareasontoapproach.Whenyouapproachwithareason,youwillappearmoreconfidentandmoreattractivetowomen.Plus,itmakestheapproachahellofaloteasier.

Step5:Startpullingothersintoyourgame.Youareupforafunnightsomakeitmemorable.Bealeaderandgaintheattractionofothersinthebar.Ifyoufollowthesefivestepsonhowtomeetwomenwhiletravelingalone,Iguaranteeyourbusinesstripswillnolongerfeelsodepressingandlonely.Whetherornotyoumeetawoman,youwillenjoyyournight.

Marni

WhenShouldAGuyApproachAWoman?

Email:

Marni,

Latelastnight,Iwentgroceryshopping.Upongoingtocheckout,IsawawomanthatIwasextremelyattractedto.

Whilewecheckedout,Idecidedtotakeadifferentpathtomycaronlytofindoutthatshewasparkednearme.Shewaswearingbikinggearandhadabikeinthebackofhertruck.IthinkthisintimidatedmealittlebecauseIdidnotapproachher.Reasonbeing,IreallythoughtIwouldbebotheringher.Idothisallthetimeandwanttostopwastinggreatopportunities.

Myquestiontoyouis,WhencanIapproachawoman?

Ian

Myresponse:

Ian,

Theshortanswertoyourquestionisalways.Ifyouseeawomanyouwant,approachher.Remember,itsaboutyoufirst,hersecond.Itsoundslikethereisalotofpressureonyourapproachesandyoumaybethinkinglargepictureinsteadofsmallpicture.

LargePicture:Iamgoingtoapproachthisgirl,sheisgoingtobeattractedtome,Iamgoingtogethernumber,wearegoingtodate,andhavesex.

SmallPicture:Thatgirliscute,IwanttotalktoherandseeifIlikeher.

Havingthesmallpictureinmindbeforeanyapproacheswillmakeitaloteasieronyou.Ifyoudonotattachalargepictureoutcometoyouractions,thenyoumaynotfeelasmuchpressuretosucceed.Iwanttocommentononeotherthingyousaidinyouremailwhereyousaidyouthoughtyouwouldbebotheringher.IheartheseassumptionsfromthemenIworkwithallthetime.

Assumptionsgonewrong:

Shesnotmytype

Shewontbeintome

Imtooshortforher

Imtoofat/bald/skinnyforher

Sheprobablyhasaboyfriend

Shesbusyrightnow

Shedoesntwanttobebothered

Sheswithherfriendsanddoesntwanttobeinterrupted

Itsveryinterestingthatthesemenknowsomuchaboutawomantheyhaveneverspoken

tobefore!WhatIfindmoreinterestingisthatsomanymenaremindreaders.Theseassumptionsarefearsdisguisedasintelligentjustifications.ThesearewhatIliketocallconceivedtruthsthatstopusfromgettingwhatwewant.Pleasedonotfallvictim.

Approacheverywomanthatpeaksyourinterestanddecidewhatcategoryyouwanttoputherinafteryouhavesomefactstobaseiton.

Marni

GetOffYourAssandStartPracticing!

Youwanttoknowthesecrettopickingupwomen?Getoffyourassandapproachthem.

Youarenevergoingtomeetawomanifyou:

Sitathomeandmoanabouthowyoucantmeetwomen.Dontapproachthewomenyouwant.

Sohowdothesuccessfulguysdoit?Howdotheyknowwhattosay?Whentotouchher?Howtomakeherwantthem?

Theguyswhoaresuccessfuldidnotstartasnaturalsuperstars.Wellsomeofthemdid,butthemajorityofthemenwhoaregreatwithwomenlearnedtheirskillsthroughpractice.Theygotofftheirbuttsandapproached.Theywererejectedandwereturneddownrepeatedlyandoveragain,untiltheybuiltuptheirconfidenceandstartedseeingresults.

WhereamIgoingwiththis?Ihavebeenfascinatedwithroutineandself-disciplinelately(mainlybecauseIdidnthaveeither.)SowhatdidIdo?Ischeduled,createdasystem,andamnowtrainingmyselftobecomemoredisciplinedinmyday-to-dayworklife.Itischallengingandexhaustingbutitispayingoff.Iamseeingresults.Itisthesamethingforyouinyourquesttofigureouthowtopickupwomen.Itallstartswithpushingyourselfandfiguringoutwhatworksbestforyou.

DoesPracticeReallyGetResults?

Email:

HeyMarni,

Idefinitelyfallintothatcategoryofguyswhoreadalotbutdonotpracticeenough.IfIwanttochangethat,IguessIambacktogoingoutanddoingapproachesagain.WhichIadmitIamnotcrazyaboutjustbecauseIdohavesomuchtroublewithit.However,whatIfigureIwilldoisstartwithjustsayingsomething,anything,andnotworryaboutwhathappensafterthat.Iguessjusttryanddothiseveryday.

ThanksMarni,

Dave

Myresponse:

Dave,

First,nomoresadtalk.Icanhearhowdiscouragedyouarethroughyourwriting.Alittletipisthatifyoustartusingmoreupliftingwordsandexpressingyourselfmorepositivelyyouwillactuallybecomemorepositive.

Alittlechickenbeforetheeggscienceshit.Nowontoyourquestion.Itsnotaboutapproaches.Itsaboutunderstandingthatgivingyourselfonemonthofgoingoutonceortwiceaweekisnotgoingtogetyoutheresultsyouwant.

Ifyouwantedajob,youwouldnotputoutthreeresumesandhopeyougetabite.Youwouldgotoarecruiter(onlinedating),reachouttoyourcontacts(friendsandfriendssocialgatherings);youwouldresearchcompanieswhoarehiringandcontactthem(coldapproaches).Ifyouhavedoneallthesethingsmanytimesoverthenyouaredoingenough.Ifnot,youstillhavemanyfuntimesaheadofyou!

Rightnowisyourresearchphasewhereyoucanscrewup,takechances,andexperimentwithoutfear.Becauseitisallforyou.Sogetoutthere,startapproaching,andseewhatworksforyou.

Marni

IsSheTestingMe?

Email:

HiMarni,

Ihadanexperiencetodayinwhichtheoutcomesurprisedmealittlebit.IwenttothehairdressersatanewplacethatIhadnotbeenbefore.Iwastalkingtothegirlwhowascuttingmyhairandweweregettingalongquitewell,goodconversationetc.Itwasnearingtheendofthedayandtheothergirlsworkingtherewenthome,asitwasquiet.

Atthistime,shedidnotworryaboutkeepinghervoicedownasmuchandactuallyintroducedherselftome,withoutmeevenaskinghername(whichIthoughtwasagoodindication)butinthenextfewmomentssheproceededtotellmethatshehasahusband,whichtookmetotallybysurprise!Whywouldshebotherintroducingnames?

Iwasgoingtoaskherout,butIamaniceguysonotafterIheardthat.Wasitjustatraporatest?

Cheers,

Justin.(Ijustdownloadedyourcoursethisweek,learningalotsofar!)

Myreply:

Justin

Whoa!Whoa!Whoa!Slowyourroll.Trap?Test?Notatall.Justbecauseawomanisinarelationshipdoesnotmeanshehastoremoveherselffromsocialsociety.Women,evenwomeninrelationships,arecertainlyallowedtoengageinharmlessconversationwitha

mantheyhavenointentionofdating.

Thinkaboutitthisway:Youconfidentlystartedtalkingtoher;shetalkedback,wasengagedintheconversation,likedtheconversation,andwashavingagoodtimetalkingtoyou.Isthatabadthing?No.Didsheleadyouon?No.Infact,shedidtheopposite.

Toensuretherewouldnotbeanyconfusionastowhatthiswas,sheletyouknowshewasinarelationship.Thisishersilentlysaying,Idontwanttogiveyouthewrongideaandleadyouon?Iamenjoyingtalkingtoyou.

Honestly,shemaynotevenbethinkingthatatall.Shemayjustbethinking,Iminagoodconversationwithanotherhumanbeing.Done!Womenarenotouttogetyouandtheycertainlyarenotouttotestyouorputyouthroughtheringer.Thiswomanwasjustengaginginconversationwithanobviouslygoodconversationalist!

Marni

HowDoIHandleFemaleCockBlocks?

Email:

Iwasouttheothernighttalkingtothisgirlandwithintwominutesoftalkingherfriendscameovertoseewhatwasgoingon.Then,afteranothertwominutes,theypulledheraway.Whyarewomensonosy?

Neil

Myresponse:

Neil,

Womencanbenosyforseveralreasons:

1Jealousy:Theyarebitterandwantsomeattentiontoo.

2Protectiveness:Untilthatwomanknowsyou,whoyouareandwhyyouaretalkingtoherfriend,sheisnotgoingtotrustyou.Menrape,menbreakfriendshearts,andmenmayhavehurtherinthepast.Sheseesherselfaslovingandtheprotectorofherfriend.

3Disapproval:Sinceshedoesnotknowyoushehasnothingtobaseherdisapprovalforyouonotherthanpastexperience.Herexmayhavelookedlikeyousoinhermindsheknowsthekindofguyyouarebyyourlook.

4Unaware:Somewomenarejustsocaughtupintheirownshitthattheyreallyarenotevenawareofothers.

5Caring:Thegirlyouweretalkingtomayhavejusthadabadbreakupsoherfriendthinksitsbestforhertostaysingle,havefunandenjoyherself.Thisislinkedtoprotectiveness.

Sonow,youhavefivereasonsastowhywomenarenosy.However,themostimportantthingtorecognizeisthatthegirldidnotcomebacktoyouagain.Herfriendsdonothavethatmuchpoweroverhertokeepherawayfromaguyshemayormaynotlike.

Tip:Onethingyoucouldhavedonewasbefriendthewholegroupinsteadofkeepingthewomanawayfromherfriends.Anotherisaskingforhernumberifshecamebacktoyou.

Marni

HowDoIBuildAttractionandTakeIttotheNextLevel?

Email:

DearMarni,

Im28yearsoldandcurrentlyliveinMinot,ND.

ThemostimportantthingaboutwomenIwanttounderstandisonhowtobuildattractionandtakeinteractionstothenextlevel.Icangouptowomenandhaveconversations,butIusuallyseemyselfbeingputintotheFriendZone.

WhatIreallywanttoknowandunderstandishowtoshapemyinteractionssoIputoffanattractive,sexualvibe.Inaddition,Iwanttoknowhowtotakethingstothenextlevel,fromconversationstogettingintoarelationshipandgettingphysical.

Thanks,Richard

Myresponse:

Richard,

Thisisagreatquestionandaverycommonone.Asawoman,Ihavetonsofguysapproachme.IamnotafoolandIusuallyknowwhattheywantfrommebuttheyalwayspretendtheywantsomethingelse.Meaningtheyactfriendlyasnottosetoffmyhesattractedtomealerts.

ThetruthisIwouldratherhesetoffthosealertsandbestraightabouthisintentions.ThatswhatIamattractedto,andthatiswhatIwanttobewith.Pleaseknow,Iamnotsayingtobeanaggressive,abrasivejerk.Iamadvisingyoutoknowwhatyouwantandaskforit.

Forexample,youseeagirlyoulikesoyouapproachherandstartaconversation.Thewhatyouwantportionshouldbe,Thatgirlscute,shecaughtmyattention,letsseeifIlikehermore.

FallingintotheFriendZonehappensforsomanyguysbecauseatfirst,tonotsetoffherhittingonmealertsorhesattractedtomealerts,theyapproachasfriends.Theintentionforth