feature story: mature parents offer unique experiences for adopted children

7/29/2019 Feature Story: Mature Parents Offer Unique Experiences for Adopted Children

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Larry and Caryle Anger travelled to Guatemala fourteen years ago, bringing back more than

just a few souvenirs to share with their grandchildren. This was a long awaited trip and was the final

stage of their international adoption. The couple, then 57 and 55, had gone through a series of

steps, as well as a few ups and downs, on their adoption journey. Now, they were on their way to

meet their son- finally!

As an older couple looking to adopt an infant, the Angers received some mixed reactions from their

friends and family.

My mother-in-law said Dont you think youve had enough kids already?

Some people just didnt understand why a couple at their age- about to enter retirement- would

choose to adopt.

Many people at our age want to just travel and do the things theyve always wanted to. We were

lucky enough to have done these things and thought raising a child was what we wanted to spend

our time doing, said Caryle.

November isAdoption Awareness Month

Mature Parents Offer UniqueExperiences for Adopted

Children

Adoption Late in Life

Benefits Every

Member of the

Extended Family

Roberto Anger,

15, stands with

his neice,

Kimberlyn

Slattery, 16.


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Where Can I Adopt?International Adoption

Age Restrictions

Guatemala

No age restrictionChina

Under 50

Russia

No more than 45 years older

than adoptee

Ethiopia


than adoptee

South Korea

Under 45Vietnam

No age restriction

Ukraine


than adoptee

India

Combined age of 90

Philippines

No age restriction

www.adoptivefamilies.com/countries.php

The Angers had no shortage of time to spend and even

did three years of home schooling for the experience.

This allowed the family to go on various vacations

throughout Europe and North America.

Larry and Caryle did a lot of research in order to find out

which countries had age restrictions. Many countrieshave a cap off age of 45, or a rule that an age gap of no

more than 45 years is allowed.

The couple decided on Guatemala, a country with fewer

guidelines and no cap off age, was the best decision.

The Angers have experienced the heartache of having

adoption plans fall through. After planning to go pick up a

little girl and having circumstances change, Larry and

Caryle were matched up with Roberto.

They received a photograph in the mail of a little boy in a

crib, dark skin, a mop of wavy hair, and big brown eyes.

The Angers and their family passed the picture around

and hoped for the best.

Today, 15-year-old Roberto stands tall at 512. He has the

same big brown eyes, but his hair is carefully styled now.

Roberto goes to high school in a small town in Southern

Ontario, the same one his siblings, nieces and nephewsall went to.

Roberto has grown up with adult siblings his whole life, him being around fifteen years younger

than his youngest sibling. Although he feels he missed out because his siblings grew up together,

Roberto feels lucky to have siblings that have gone through it all before.

My siblings are almost like mentors. I look up to them for advice.

Roberto has a unique relationship with each of his siblings.

I find that with my sister Jennifer, its more of a verbal thing. I ask her for advice and stuff. With my

siblings Dave and Michele, its more of me watching them and seeing how they deal with things.

They lead by example.

Roberto said, keeping up a relationship with his siblings through the age gap is interesting.

You just have to find what you do have in common and go from there. With my brother Dave, we

talk about music because we are both really into that.


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Because Robertos siblings are older, he has gotten to grow up with all his nieces and

nephews.

I always laugh when people find out Im their uncle, not their cousin. People are used to

having cousins the same age, but not an uncle.

Roberto has eleven nieces and nephews; seven older than him and four younger.

At family things there were always groups of who hung out, depending on age. I was in

the middle group.

Roberto has had more of a cousinship with his nieces and nephews. He had a strong

friendship though, especially with Kimberlyn Slattery, who was born a year before him.

We used to play a game where wed pull the cats tail and try not to get scratched.

Roberto usually won, but wed both end up running away from the cat and giggling.

Kimberlyn was very young when she found out shed be getting a new uncle.

I remember standing by my Nanny and Papas side door, standing on the hose of the

vacuum, and nanny was talking to me about him. I just remember thinking his name was

Toe, and thinking, Well thats a silly name!

Larry and Caryle Anger, their children and grandchildren


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The two have many memories

together, from splashing around at

the waterpark in Florida, to going to

homeschool groups together.

Nowadays their relationship is a bit

different.

We hang out in different groups at

school, but I know I can always go to

her for advice. says Roberto.

Now, it isnt weird for us to go to

each other and get boy or girl

advice, says Kimberlyn. Its nice

because we can help each other

understand how girls or guys think.

The two have grown together and

gone through different stages.

When we are married someday and

have kids well be going through

things together, Roberto shared. Even though I didnt experience everything with my

siblings, I have nieces and nephews that Ill experience it with.

Hell always be in my family so its not like normal high school friendships. Our kids

will be close someday. Its like we have a built in best friend, says Kimberlyn.

Although some countries and many people believe

there should be an age cap off with adoption, its

hard to look at the Anger family and justify it.

Roberto has grown to be a smart young man with a

strong sense of home, supported in all he does by a

loving family.

November isAdoption Awareness Month

For more information

on International

Adoption please visit

TodaysParent.ca

feature story: mature parents offer unique experiences for adopted children

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