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Janet Belsky’s

Experiencing the Lifespan, 2e

Chapter 10

Constructing an Adult Life

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Emerging into Adulthood

Emerging adulthood begins after high school and tapers off

by late twenties.

�Function of emerging adulthood includes exploration and

trying out adult roles.

�However, emerging adults are typically not ready to settle

down and take on adult responsibilities such as getting

married, having children, etc.

�Emerging adulthood is focuses on developing self-

development.

Emerging Adulthood:

challenges and changes

This stage of life is typically considered the

most challenging and change-inducing stage

of life based on:

�The need to re-center life roles –focusing

on responsibility, supporting self, and

making independent decisions about life.

�The change to an unstructured path (e.g.,

college, independent living, work world,

as opposed to the previously highly

structured environment of adolescence.

Major effects on emerging

Adulthood: Culture and History

�Emerging adulthood has changed with developed world.

�Emerging adults are prolonging decisions on careers and

marriage, therefore postponing adults roles. This is due to:

�Life expectancy gains: People now live into their 70s or 80s,

as opposed to 60s a half-century ago. This offers emerging

adults the luxury of postponing adult commitments until later.

�Changes in education and workforce: a half-century ago

(1960s), high school graduates could successfully entered the

workforce. Now, most go to college, typically spending about 6

years in college before entering the workforce.

�Cultural norms focusing on self-expression: emerging

adults focusing more on self, thus making dramatic life changes

throughout adult life.

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Emerging adulthood in Southern Europe:

A Difficult Time

�Due to economic issues, in Spain

and Italy priority is placed on hiring

men (and women) with families, so

it is hard for young people to find

jobs.

�In these countries, there are strong

norms against cohabitating and

beginning families prior to

marriage.

�So many young people in these

countries continue to live with their

parents.

�Reaching full adulthood–and

having the financial ability to leave

home –often does not happen

until their 30s.

Emerging adulthood in Scandinavian

countries: A time of true exploration

�In these countries, independence is

typically encouraged in emerging

adulthood due to:

�College being financed by the government.

�Employers making efforts to hire the young.

�Free health care for all ages.

�These factors combined make it possible for young

people to leave the parent’s home and successfully live

independently.

�In Sweden, it is common for young people to cohabitate

and have children before being married.

United States: Independence

vs. Dependence

�There are similarities with U.S. young

people as in Scandinavian countries.

�Cohabitation

�Children before marriage

�Leaving home after high school (age

18)

�In the U.S., one exception to these

similarities occurs –there is less focus

on helping young people emerge into

the world of work.

�This exception causes a less smooth,

predicable transition to adulthood.

Leaving home: Stay or go or

both?

�Historically, women left home when they married, men when they

become financially stable. (nest-leaving)

�This change occurred with the draft of WWII and more young

people attending college.

�Currently, although many young people leave home after high

school, they often return home. This is due to:

�A fundamental need for help from parents

�Graduation from college

�Leaving the work force for more education

�This return home can be both positive and negative.

�Even if parent-child relationships are rocky, parents still these reentries.

�Reentry to the parental home can lead to a feeling of “back-sliding” to a part of life that had been

left behind.

�Nest-leaving is not a universal developmental task. Many young people

in other cultures chose to live with parents to help provide economic

support.

�Some cultures view this choice as a signal they have become an adult.

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The ticking social clock

�Social clock–the idea that we chart our adult progress by referring

to shared age norms

�On-time –matching the normal timetable

�Off-time –too early or too late of the normal timetable

�Are we on-time (on schedule) or off-time (either too early or too

late) for what we-and society-expect at our age?

�Being off-time in the late directioncan cause physical and

mental stress. For example, beginning career late or marrying

late.

�The social clock norms may vary depending on the culture and

cohorts. For example, women marrying late at one point were

called “old maids.”

�Another issue is the lack of control regarding some of these

developmental task. For example, wanting to marry at typical

age with no significant relationship.

Constructing an Identity –Erikson’s

Psychosocial stage

�Identity versus Role Confusion

�Identity –the life task of deciding who to be as a

person in making the transition to adulthood.

�Indentify confusion –a failure in identify formation,

marked by the lack of sense of a future adult path.

�Moratorium–taking time out to explore various paths.

Erikson believed this moratorium was crucial to

building a solid adult identity.

James Marcia -Identity Statuses

�Marcia developed four different identity statues which expanded on

Erikson’s theory.

�Diffusion–young people drifting aimlessly toward adulthood

without goals. This compares to Erikson’s role confusion. “I don’t

know what I want to do, nothing appeals to me.”

�Foreclosure–young people who adopt an identity without any

self-exploration or thought. “My parents want me to continue the

family business, so that’s what I’ll do.”

�Moratorium–young people who engage in exciting, health

search for adulthood. This is often an internal process which can

be anxiety-provoking due to the exploration of different

philosophies and ideas. “Let me try this, that, and the other. How

can I chose from so many careers in which I have an interest.”

�Achievement –the end result where identity formation is

complete.(“I know what I want to do with my life; I have found

my calling.”)

Considerations of Identity Statuses

�Marcia originally believed we move from diffusion to

moratorium to achievement.

�However, real life identity construction tends to be

more erratic, moving back and forth in statues

throughout adulthood.

�These shifts are actually productive, helping to

consistently review goals and directions.

�One concern –some do not move successfully

toward an identity search but find themselves stuck.

�The search for identity is not a universal

developmental task but affected by life

circumstances.

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Ethnic Identity

�Ethnic identity –the sense of belonging to a specific

ethnic category.

�Some develop dual minorities or reject one identity

for another.

�A more balanced focus is better –accepting and

knowledgeable of personal heritage while being

connected to the universal human community.

�Challenges occur for biracial or multiracial adults.

�Some may have difficulties connecting with one

ethnicity vs. the other.

�Some research indicates this struggle to make a

connection with more than one ethnicity helps

people think creatively about life.

Constructing a Career

�Compelling research (Csikszentmihalyi and Schneider, 2000)

indicates every teenager expects to go to college.

�Most expect to have professional careers, regardless of

gender or social class.

�On the positive side, this ambition and high expectations can

help teens avoid delinquent behaviors, depression and

dropping out of school.

�On the negative side, many will not reach their ambitions due

to barriers such as poverty, economic factors, etc.

�One key to predicting a successful transition to a career is the

teen’s interest in work (being productive) vs. those only

interested in playing (avoiding work).

Personality Growth during

emerging adulthood

�Research suggest that personality changes the

most in the person’s 20s.

�Significant maturity develops, with more focus

on weighing options and healthy decision

making.

�They see failures as life-lessons not

inconsequential events.

�Conscientiousness –a term developmentalists

used to describe the maturing of the frontal

lobe which helps develop self-control.

Finding Flow

�Flow-feeling of being totally absorbed

in an activity

�Time flies by unnoticed.

�Marked by extreme intrinsically motivated.

�Occurs when there is the appropriate person-

environment fit—an activity is highly challenging

and yet matches abilities.

�In activities beyond our capabilities, anxiety can

occur; activities that are too simple, boredom can

occur.

�Flow can be a good predictor of potential careers.

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College –the real story

�2 of every 3 U.S. high school graduates enroll in

college.

�However, half of all freshmen do not graduate.

�1 in 4 emerging adults has completed a four-year

degree.

�Most enter the primary labor market –jobs that

offer good salaries, benefits, and health care.

Workforce –the real story

�Those not attending college can have fulfilling careers, often other

types of intelligence (practical or creative intelligence). Examples of

these non-college graduates include Bill Gates and Wood Allen.

�However, young people who enter the workforce directly after high

school can have difficulties reaching identity achievement in their

careers by 30s or 40s.

�Most often, these young people enter the secondary labor market -

jobs with few benefits and low pay.

�Research indicates that success can depend on chance for

advanced, friendly co-workers, opportunity to enhance work skills.

Workforce –the real story, cont.

�Planful competence (the ability to have a procative

“work like” strategy to finding work) can help with

job-satisfaction

�The key to constructing a satisfying non-college

career is to undertake a moratorium search and find

a job that gives flow.

�Sometimes taking time off to work right after high

school makes you a more focused, better student

later!

The School to WorkTransition

�Problems with the U.S. Approach:

�Encouraging high school teens to identify a career track

�Encouraging all to attend college, setting non-academically

inclined kids up for failure.

�Limited focus on helping teens enter the work force

�Some interesting alternatives:

�Japan: Instead of there being a separation between what happens at

school and work, employers develop relationships with schools and hire

students that the faculty recommends.

�The German plan: Instead of going to college, young people enter an

apprentice program that guarantees a job in that field.

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Career Search Tips

1.Don’t be overly concerned that you have not

decided on a particular career during college.

Many people take considerable time to explore

various possibilities before settling on the

satisfying career.

2.Conduct an active moratorium career search by

reaching out to people for advice and exploring

potential

3.Use the activities that give you flow as guidelines

for choosing a satisfying career. If you feel in

diffusion right now, remember that your work

orientation can change dramatically if you find a

job that gives you a sense of flow.

4.Don’t feel you must go directly to college –

especially if academics are not your “thing.” Build

up a track record at work. If you do decide to

take the college path later, you may be a better

student.

Making College a Flow Zone!

� �Becoming emotionally connected to the

college environment is key!

�Immerse yourself in the college scene.Try to

live on campus or close to school; join organizations;

if possible, avoid working long hours.

�Connect your classes to potential careers. Set

up internships or research experiences with faculty.

�Make connections with professors.Reach out to

at least one professor and be sure to see your

advisor every semester. (If that advisor seems

distant, ask a favorite professor to be your advisor!)

Predicting College Success: A Flow

Chart

Finding Love

�Eirkson’s Psychosocial stage

�Intimacy vs. Isolation

�Intimacy –the search for a

soul mate or enduring love

�Finding a mate is a western

value.

�In other countries, finding a

mate is primarily a family

responsibility.

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Changes in finding a mate

�Interracial/inter-ethnic dating

�Strong identification with racial group and/or

ethnicity is a strong predicator to choosing a

same-race/ethnicity mate.

�Same sex relationships are much more

acceptable.

�Homophobia (intense fear and dislike of gays

and lesbians) is less common.

Coming Out to Mom and Dad

�Most parents accept, love, and rally around their gay

daughters and sons, after a difficult period of coming to

terms with their child’s sexual orientation.

�4% of young people report parental rejection or verbal

abuse.

�Coming out is a gradual process. Most gay young people

reconcile their own feelings, then tell a good friend, then

tell families. (Most share with their families by age 19.)

�However, each person’s situation is unique. Diversity of

parent-child relationships is the norm.

�Bottom line for gay emerging adults: It may not be as

“bad” as you expect, but trust your gut instincts about

how your parents will respond.

Murstein’s Structured Three Phase

Mate Selection Theory

�Stimulus-Value-Role Theory

1) Stimulus Phase

�We approach people who visually appear to fit us: “I think this

person looks like we might mesh.”

2) Value Comparison Phase

�Then as we date we try to figure out whether we match up

according to values.

3) Role Phase

�Now we have decided that this is the one, and discuss our plans

for our shared life.

�Murstein suggested opposites do NOT attract. Matches

are made based on Homogamy (similarity).

�Choices are often based on “ideal-self”–the person we

want to be.

�Relationships with family can also have an impact on

mate choices.

�Irrationality and Unpredictability

�Adult Attachment Styles

Other factors affecting

relationships

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Irrationality and Unpredictability

�People in more enduring, happy

relationships see their loved ones

through rose-colored glasses (thinking

they are unrealistically perfect).

�Event-driven relationships

(REPEATEDLY breaking up; getting

back together, and then breaking up) is

not a good sign.

The Impact of Personality: Adult

Attachment Styles

Based on Ainsworth’s infant attachment styles, Hazan and

Shaver (1987) examined adult attachment styles.

�Preoccupied/ ambivalent (insecure)

�Clingy; needy; over-engulfing

�Avoidant/dismissive (insecure)

�Withholding; aloof; distant

�Securely attached

�Joyfully able to reach out in love

�Responsive to a mate’s signals

�More likely to have happy marriages or be involved in

enduring relationships.

Do Attachment Styles Shift? Sometimes

�Self-fulfilling prophecies help keep

attachment styles stable.

�Clingy people tend to be rejected more often.

�Avoidant people tend to remain isolated.

�A secure individual lives in an atmosphere of love.

�Still, attachment styles can and do change.

�Being in a loving relationship can make us secure.

�After experiencing a traumatic love affair we can

temporarily become insecure.

Evaluating your own

relationship