Head of School Message

Developing children academically without developing them spirituality is a crime against nature. Children are born with an inclination toward the spiritual – an instinct about a guiding life force. However, if that inclination is not developed, the instinct withers when the child is confronted with the secular world.

One of the most profound books I have read about spirituality in children is Lisa Miller’s “The Spiritual Child.” I recommend it highly and will share some of her insights. She defines spirituality as an “inner sense of a living relationship with a higher power.”

Early in our country’s history, religion was “woven into the fabric of the country.” However, in the last 50 years, that spiritual structure has broken down. Spiritual teaching of children has declined and secular matters have crowded out practice of the faith.

While my spiritual life gives me peace, I never thought about it in terms of providing me a competitive advantage, but Ms. Miller makes the case that developing children spiritually gives them a competitive advantage in life. Children with a strong spiritual core:

• Experience less depression, less substance abuse and fewer addictive behaviors.• Have a stronger self-identity; their sense of worth goes beyond their academic and athletic achievements.

• Have more emotional resilience because they are more reflective.• Live life with a greater sense of purpose and greater joy. Life has meaning beyond the

acquisition of material things.• Are able to show greater emotional intimacy

with others who are close to them.

Ms. Miller asserts that a “spiritual road map forms in the first decade of life…. Small children’s concept of God stems from how they are parented. The unconditional love of a child transfers to God’s unconditional love for us…. A newborn child is a spiritual soul. Our job as parents is to protect and nurture that soul.”

The attachment between parent and child develops the child’s natural capacity for compassion. Miller notes that children look for a spiritual parent in a relative or others if they don’t find it in their biological parents. Hence, the role of the parent is a sacred one.

The religious program in our Lower and Middle Schools focuses on ritual and prayer which have a strong appeal to children in this age range. Our emphasis on community, family and friendships cultivates the child’s spiritual sense.

We are finding that the introduction of mindfulness in these children dovetails smoothly with their religious training. Mindfulness and prayer relieve anxiety and focus attention. Calmer children are happier children. Dr. Maria Montessori was adamant that the classroom be a place of calm and order. In a world where messaging is incessant, children need an escape, silence and reflection.

In the second decade of a child’s life, “spiritualism surges” as physical and cognitive growth surges in adolescence. “The surge of hormones ignites a search for meaning and purpose,” Ms. Miller says. “The habits we start in adolescence continue into adulthood.” She notes the teenage years are when children “build their spiritual house where they will live as adults. Without that, the house is colder and darker.”

In the turbulent teenage years, adolescents are looking for a state of calm, bonding and transcendence. Ms. Miller notes that the “genetic expression of spirituality surges during adolescence.” Without spiritual training, children

DEVELOPING SPIRITUALITY IN CHILDREN