developing a romantic relationship online
TRANSCRIPT
Let’s Make it “Facebook Official”
Developing a Successful Romantic Relationship Online
Lisa Torres COM-451
October 30th, 2015 Professor Danaher
Ethical Issue: Behaviors (Betrayal, etc.)
• According to Merkle and Richardson, betrayal is defined as, “a violation of the trust or expectations on which a relationship is based” (Merkle & Richardson, 2000, pg. 190).
• Can be viewed as the “umbrella” for other ethical issues (i.e. manipulation, etc.)
• Far easier to perform with the advancement of technology
• According to Ben-Ze’ev, “betrayal strikes a devastating blow to our self-image as it shows how little our partner cares for us; it also shows our partner’s willingness to deceive us” (Ben-Ze’ev, 2004, p. 206).
Online
• Behaviors easier to perform
• Category-based
• Non-verbal cues harder to identify
• Expansion of social media networks and its door to cheating, etc.
• Less intimacy
In Person (Interpersonal)
• Increased face-to-face interaction (verbal and non-verbal)
• Not category-based
• Distorted cognitions less severe
• Validation on personal and emotional needs
Concepts to Understand
• Perception: active process in which we assign meaning to things or people (Stewart, 2009, pg. 163)
• Self-Disclosure: revealing of your inner most being, views, and emotions
• Face Work: your performative self (front and back stage)
Application of Concepts
• Applying Perception: awareness of perceiving others and increasing perception sensitivity
• Applying Self-Disclosure: disclosing when appropriate to do so
• Applying Face Work: letting go of your “front stage”
Conclusion
• In conclusion, it is important to remember the concepts of perception, self-disclosure, and face work. These concepts will help produce meaningful and authentic romantic relationships that everyone truly desires.
• “Love is friendship that has caught fire. It is quiet understanding, mutual confidence, sharing and forgiving. It is loyalty through good and bad times. It settles for less than perfection and makes allowances for human weaknesses.”-Ann Landers
References
• Ben-Ze’ev, A. (2004), Love Online: Emotions on the Internet , Cambridge University Press, Cambridge.
• Sun, K. (2010). Why Online Dating Is a Poor Way to Find Love. Retrieved from https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-justice-and-responsibility-league/201007/why-online-dating-is-poor-way-find-love
• Merkle, E. and Richardson, R. (2000), “Digital dating and virtual relating: conceptualizing computer mediated romantic relationships”, Family Relations, Vol. 49 No. 2, pp. 187-92.
• Stewart, J. (2009). Bridges Not Walls: A Book about Interpersonal Communication (11th Ed.). New York, NY: McGraw-Hill.
• Seidman, G. (2014). Can You Really Trust the People You Meet Online? Retrieved fromhttps://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/close-encounters/201407/can-you-really-trust-the-people-you-meet-online