data.com connect presents: alen mayer - the secrets of connecting with your clients instantly
TRANSCRIPT
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The Secrets of Connecting with Your Clients Instantly
Alen Mayer President and CEO of North American Sales Training [email protected] @mayeralen
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• 22 years in international sales and business development • President of the Sales Association Ontario Chapter • Voted Number 2 on the list of Top 50 Most Influential People in Sales Lead Management in 2013 • Author of 7 sales titles, including “Selling for Introverts”, “Introverts in Business” and “Trigger Events – how to find your next customer” • Blogger - AlenMayer.com voted as top 25 sales blog in the world • 8th worst hockey player in Canada hoping to work my way to being 20th worst in the country
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Principles of communication • Respect your client’s model of the world • The meaning of communication is the response
you get • You cannot not communicate • There is no failure, only feedback • Resistance is only a lack of rapport • The more complex the situation is, the more
behavioural flexibility you need
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Agenda • How to establish rapport with any prospect, at any moment in time • How to use verbal and non-verbal techniques topersuade • How to speak the same language of your clients’ mind to build deep level of rapport (even over the phone!)
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What is rapport? • Rapport is a process, not a thing. Rapport is
something we do with another person.
• Rapport is responsiveness - you don’t have to ‘like’ the other person.
• If you don’t have rapport, you won’t get your outcome. In any conversation, neither of you will get anywhere until you have established rapport.
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3 elements of rapport
• mutual attention, where each person is tuning in to the other
• shared positive feeling - mostly conveyed by non-verbal messages
• synchrony - people unconsciously respond to each others’ movements and gestures
Rule: If you don’t have rapport, you won’t get your outcome.
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Albert Mehrabian’s model
• 7% of the communication is in the words that are spoken.
• 38% of the communication is in the tonality (how the words are said).
• 55% of the communication is in the physiology or body language.
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Your medium
• Emails: only 7% of the communication
• Telephone: only 45% (7% words and 38% voice tonality)
• Face to face: all three - words, voice tonality and physiology
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2 Ways of Creating Rapport • Physical
• Verbal
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Physical way Physical:
• Matching and mirroring
• Pacing and leading
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Things you can match • match their body posture • hand gestures
• head tilt
• facial expressions
• breathing
• energy level
• even eye blinks!
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Things you can match
• More impact than the actual words you say.
• The more aspects you can match, the more effectively you can create rapport.
• Ask yourself: “What speed is this person running at?” - and match it.
Rule: People like people who are like them.
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Pacing and leading Pacing: • notice how your clients behave, and then you step into
the behavior of the person you want rapport with.
• pace clients by matching their body movement.
Rule: When your clients move, you move.
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Pacing and leading Leading: • pace for few minutes, then lead and watch if they follow.
• behavioral flexibility is the key - person with the most flexibility wins.
• if it’s not working, change your approach - pace them a little slower.
• shorten this time – then you will be able to lead;
• keep leading until sale is closed.
Rule: Objections occur when you lose rapport.
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Objection! If you lose rapport: • go back and pace and pace and pace before you lead.
• Ask: “I feel that something changed. You were here right with me a few moments ago. What changed? Did you think of something that you would like to ask me?”
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Objection! Dance with your client: • pace and pace and pace, and then you lead and lead and
lead.
• If it’s working, continue with your presentation until the end.
• If you lose them, stop and pace and pace and pace them.
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How do you recognize rapport? • You’ll feel it. • You lead, they follow.
• Your customers may tell you.
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Verbal pacing and phone
• Same rule: pace, pace, pace, and then you lead.
• Cold calling works only if you pay attention to your audience and pace them.
• Adjust yourself to other person immediately.
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Verbal pacing • Voice tone (pitch) - high or low? • Volume (loudness) - do they speak quietly or loudly?
• Tempo (speed) - how fast or slowly do they speak?
• Timbre (quality) - what qualities do you hear in their voice? Clear or husky?
• Rhythm - a flowing melody in their sentences or do they pronounce their words in a staccato way?
• Using the same sensory words as them (EEE™ system) • Talking at the rate they’re breathing
• Accent is probably best left alone!
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The EEE Representational System
• Eyes (Visual) • Ears (Auditory - hearing)
• Emotions (Kinesthetic - touch)
• Olfactory (smell)
• Gustatory (taste) {S e n s o r y
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1. ‘The movie was really good. The photography was brilliant. You really got a deep insight into the main characters’ minds. The images were memorable, and I would love to see it again.’ - VISUAL
2. ‘What a strong movie that was! Really powerful characterisation that held your attention. The feelings of the characters really came over. Go and see it whatever you do. It is a hit. You will be riveted to the screen.’ - KINESTHETIC
3. ‘I’ve got to tell you about this movie. Marvellous dialogue and a terrific soundtrack. The motives of the principal characters came over loud and clear. I like a movie that tells a good story.’ - AUDITORY
The EEE Rep. System - example
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The EEE Representational System
Eye or Visual: ! Memorize by seeing pictures
! Have trouble remembering verbal instructions
! Tend to stand up straight, breathe from the top of the chest
! Prefer to stand back so they can see you
! Interested in whether things 'look good'
! Tend to move, think and talk faster
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Ear or Auditory: " Easily distracted by noise
" May think using 'external dialogue'
" Learn by listening
" Can repeat things back to you easily
" Breathe from middle of chest
" Tone of voice very important
" Interested in whether things 'sound right'
" Like to be close enough to hear you
The EEE Representational System
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Emotion or Kinaesthetic: I Often talk and breathe slowly
I Respond to physical rewards and touch
I Memorise by doing or walking through things
I Breathe from abdomen
I Interested in whether things 'feel right'
I Like to be close enough to touch you
The EEE Representational System
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How to influence visual clients
Listen to your clients to hear if they use words like: • Picture, clear, sight, see, light, focus, vision, draw, outlook,
preview, paint.
• They could use visual phrases like: appears to me; beyond a shadow of a doubt; get a perspective on; in light of; in view of; looks like; showing off; sight for sore eyes; under your nose; up front.
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How to influence visual clients
• Use visual words with a ‘visual’ person • “Let me show you what we need to do about it…”
• Use graphs, pictures, and videos to make your point.
• Help them see the opportunities in dealing with you and the possible outcomes.
• Use video communication like Skype and try to avoid the phone; they are known to be poor listeners.
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How to influence visual clients
Questions to ask: • Can you see what I am saying?
• Is that aligned with your vision?
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If I could SHOW you… If this LOOKS GOOD…
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How to influence auditory clients
Listen for words like: • hear, clear, music, rhythm, loud, sound, tell, voice, unheard
of, rumble, tone.
People who prefer this system use phrases like:
• Clearly expressed; call on; describe in detail; earful; hidden message; hold your tongue; loud and clear; manner of speaking; power of speech; rings a bell; to tell the truth; unheard of; voice an opinion.
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How to influence auditory clients
• If you want to influence them, you need to talk to them. • Auditory people can be persuaded by hearing quotes from
satisfied customers.
• To motivate them, you need to tell them what other clients said about your solutions.
• Play the audio recording of a testimonial (if you have one).
• They will not read any written materials. Use the phone as your main tool of communication.
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How to influence auditory clients
• If you use auditory words with an ‘auditory’ person, it’s easier for them to understand because they don’t have to translate from another system.
Questions to ask are:
• Do you hear what I am saying?
• Does it sound like something we can agree upon?
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If I could TELL you… If this SOUNDS GOOD…
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How to influence kinesthetic clients
Listen to words like: • Grasp, handle, feel, rough, smooth, slippery, hurt,
comfortable, hold, warm, heavy, push.
If you hear following phrases, you are talking to a kinesthetic person:
• Boils down to; come to grips with; control yourself; cool/calm; get a handle on; get a load of this; get in touch with; hand in hand; hang in there; hold it; hold on; know-how; lay cards on a table; pain in the neck; pull some strings; slipped my mind; start from scratch
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• give them something to touch or send them something to feel, because they need to touch things.
• Keep them active by giving them printed materials to read or marketing materials to hold.
• Try to meet with them face-to-face.
How to influence kinesthetic clients
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Questions to ask are: • Do you feel my concern about this problem?
• What is your gut feeling about it?
How to influence kinesthetic clients
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If you could GET A FEEL FOR IT… If this FEELS GOOD…
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Summary
• To persuade your clients, your communication needs to be in the preferred representational system of your prospects.
• If you are not sure what system to use at the beginning, create your message by using a mix of the EEE representational system ‘keywords’.
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Practising Rapport • Notice examples of people in rapport around you. • Practice non-verbal rapport with strangers.
• Choose a different aspect of rapport to practice every day.
• Watch TV. Notice the type of words that people on the TV are using. Listen to the representational systems rather than the content.
• When that gets too easy, rephrase what they are saying in a different representational system.
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Final words of wisdom
• Each of us has our own unique map of reality.
• If you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll always get what you’ve always got.
• The meaning of your communication is the response you get regardless of your intention.
Rule: Sell unto others, the way they want to be sold to.
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Alen Mayer, CSP Sales Trainer, Author and Coach
Phone: 647-427-1588
www.alenmayer.com Twitter.com/mayeralen
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Thank You Thank You
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Coming Up at 3:00 p.m.
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