banish your inner critic - how interactive conference, boston
TRANSCRIPT
Banish Your Inner Critic
Denise R. Jacobs HOW Interactive Conf w Boston, MA w 5 November 2015
@denisejacobs #HIDC @HOWbrand
#banishyourcritic
Want the slides? Go here:
Creativedo.se/hidcbos-ic
Photo by Derek Kearney
Wait…What?!
Founder + CEO, The Creative Dose http://TheCreativeDose.com/
Upon a time… http://www.behance.net/gallery/Once-Upon-a-Time/2918365
29 June http://www.flickr.com/photos/jblndl/3154255478/
I was going to be a writer! Photo: Denise Jacobs
Instead of creativity Photo from Flickr.com
Destructivity http://www.flickr.com/photos/kevygee/3265941065/
The voices in my head were merciless http://www.flickr.com/photos/epsos/4887528060/
I totally freaked out
I shouldn't be writing this I misrepresented myself
I don't know enough This should be someone else’s book
I’m going to look stupid Everyone will see that I’m a fake What if it's not good enough? What if I'm not good enough?
No…really!
2 days http://www.flickr.com/photos/fiery-phoenix/8428079916/
Worked non-stop https://www.flickr.com/photos/53611153@N00/5827849044/
Pushed myself to burn-out
http://www.flickr.com/photos/44085287@N05/4052943367/
My internal critical voices http://www.flickr.com/photos/mikeapalooza/553545517/
Made this happen
https://www.flickr.com/photos/70938871@N05/8230432077
Physical evidence of fear http://www.flickr.com/photos/grumpyfeline/4626401443/
A different kind of fear Photo: Denise Jacobs
Internalized criticisms + fears
https://www.flickr.com/photos/remoto/5313967682
= The Inner Critic https://www.flickr.com/photos/acerriteno/3484093889/
F.E.A.R. =
http://cdnpix.com/show/imgs/7a361666e107cd36656d5a66ea2e4e80.jpg
Or…
https://twitter.com/Phishtitz/status/474661495935365120
YES! (…and…) https://www.flickr.com/photos/willsan/3780293130
The enemy of creativity
http://www.flickr.com/photos/richardwinchell/130344669/
Stress & frustration
https://www.flickr.com/photos/corneveaux/3248566797/
Suppress generative impulses in the brain
https://www.flickr.com/photos/birthintobeing/11841180046
Thoughts = h!ps://www.flickr.com/photos/57375589@N05/9046508025/
Electrical impulses = http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Neuron-matrix.png
= Brainwaves! http://uniteunderfreedom.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/09/Brain-waves.jpg
Know your brainwaves
Blocks creative expression http://www.flickr.com/photos/anieto2k/8156999698/
“The parts of your brain that are responsible for self-monitoring are literally turned off during creative endeavors….Creative people have mastered the art of turning off [the inhibitive] part of their brains to let their ideas flow more smoothly, unleashing their imagination.” - Tina Seelig, InGenius
How to ID your Inner Critic http://www.flickr.com/photos/lambdachialpha/203904103/
Listen for internal critical talk http://brenebrown.com/2014/04/08/daring-interview-series-meet-gavin-aung/
“OMG, I’m SO busy!”
“I should have done more by now…” http://www.flickr.com/photos/kharied/3315558702/
“They’ll find out I’m a fraud”
vs. “NAILED IT!” https://www.flickr.com/photos/paul-drummond/3946893897
“I don’t know enough”
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/6/66/Einstein_1921_by_F_Schmutzer.jpg
(You can be intimidated into this, btw)
“It needs to be FLAWLESS” http://www.flickr.com/photos/diepuppenstubensammlerin/7648792510/
“I’ll do it tomorrow…”
http://www.flickr.com/photos/irrezolut/2311904560/
“Really, I’ll do it tomorrow.”
http://www.flickr.com/photos/irrezolut/2311904560/
“I will do it tomorrow!”
http://www.flickr.com/photos/irrezolut/2311904560/
Feed each other
Afflicts ALL of us!
http://comediansincarsgettingcoffee.com/jimmy-fallon-the-unsinkable-legend-part-2 (@ 8:15)
“…I don’t have what these people want to see – they want to see a funny guy! That’s not me.” - Jerry Seinfeld, Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee
https://www.flickr.com/photos/97477873@N00/13016287284/
*Everyone* has these thoughts
https://www.flickr.com/photos/quinnanya/5788826472/
https://www.flickr.com/photos/dhinson/1290445055/
Instructions: 1) Write down one fear around your creativity 2) Crumple paper into ball Then…
3) Throw across the room! http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-b1-baSAE8ZI/VDM3BbuiaFI/AAAAAAAABKk/l91FBGvSgkA/s1600/IMAGE_437.jpg
Sound familiar? Photo: Denise Jacobs
You’re not the only one https://www.flickr.com/photos/17843347@N05/4610644207/
In order for http://www.flickr.com/photos/designandtechnologydepartment/4771136128/
We need brain management https://www.flickr.com/photos/arselectronica/13994747444
https://www.flickr.com/photos/nrbelex/2247397943/
“You must be unintimidated by your own thoughts because if you [try to create] with someone looking over your shoulder, you'll never [create].” – Nikki Giovanni
“The goal is to manage anxiety so that our energies are used for the productive and satisfying art of creating…
…rather than the destructive and debilitating art of self-torture. “ - Clare Warmke, Idea Revolution
How do we…
http://www.flickr.com/photos/opensourceway/5445602998/
Banish the Inner Critic?
https://www.flickr.com/photos/31505964@N08/4691019168/
You can’t outrun the voices http://www.flickr.com/photos/wester/504925076/
Eliminate “Have to/Should/Must/Ought”
http://www.flickr.com/photos/mythoto/3822942678/
Replace with “I choose/ I decide/ I will” https://www.flickr.com/photos/mstry-2525-gst/3312199285/
Say NO to Comparisons http://www.flickr.com/photos/suvodeb/2559017400/
“You cannot compare your insides to someone else’s outsides.”
You & what you produce is unique
Establish boundaries https://www.flickr.com/photos/thisisawakeupcall/5595296868/
(Btw, this your new mantra…) http://www.spunkysapphire.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/photo-1-e1406074730116.jpg
Beat Impostor Syndrome
Impostor Syndrome Paradox
http://www.flickr.com/photos/x1brett/2279939232/
You will only experience impostor syndrome when you are competent and skilled.
(re-read this as many times as necessary.)
Ask it questions http://www.flickr.com/photos/opensourceway/4749432145/
Be compassionate http://www.flickr.com/photos/wrote/2646295354/
Reassign duty
http://www.flickr.com/photos/shavawnmarie/1326123397/
Remember your successes http://www.flickr.com/photos/pocait/2847866615/
(My personal version) Photo: Denise Jacobs
Cop a Power Pose
“Our bodies change our minds, our minds change our behavior, and our behavior changes our outcomes.” - Amy Cuddy, “Your Body Language Shapes Who You Are” TED talk
Breaking the loop
Perfectionism http://www.flickr.com/photos/diepuppenstubensammlerin/7648792510/
“Perfectionism is self-abuse of the highest order.” ― Anne Wilson Schaef
The real problem
http://cuttingthecheese.files.wordpress.com/2012/06/26810560251953842_ede18tng_f.jpg
Perfectionists focus on the finished product…
https://www.flickr.com/photos/phatcontroller/3667889959/
Rather than the process http://www.flickr.com/photos/spyndle/474122586/
“The Best” vs “The most” https://www.flickr.com/photos/villify/10871945326
Clear the pipes: Morning Pages https://www.flickr.com/photos/juliejordanscott/4970674253//
Be bad/make it ugly https://www.flickr.com/photos/kpwerker/6051104684
Embrace the “SFD” Twitter, circa 2006
Satisfice https://www.flickr.com/photos/sleepyvalley/3650673328
Amen! https://twitter.com/dickelippe/status/581204005013078016/photo/1
Fear of being judged? https://www.flickr.com/photos/jdlasica/12825451433/
Remember egocentricity
Reframe fear of failure http://www.flickr.com/photos/laughingsquid/2717325940/
http://culturecatch.com/files/images/after-earth.jpg
“Fear is not real. It is a product of the
thoughts you create. Do not misunderstand
me. Danger is very real. But fear is a choice.”
- character of Cypher Raige, After Earth
Embrace failure and mistakez https://www.flickr.com/photos/stevendepolo/4498817330/
“Being right keeps us in place. Being wrong forces us to explore.” – Steven Johnson, Where Good Ideas Come From
Copy the #fail masters Photo: Denise Jacobs
http://www.flickr.com/photos/seandreilinger/959864706/
Take steps, #FAIL; Go again!
“Failure is only the opportunity to begin again more intelligently.” - Henry Ford
Decouple performance from identity https://www.flickr.com/photos/krissen/6824608878
Perfection ≠ Excellence
https://www.flickr.com/photos/kaldoche/4771465356
“Don’t let perfect become the enemy of good.” – Voltaire
Procrastination
http://www.flickr.com/photos/irrezolut/2311904560/
The trick is not self-identifying… http://20px.com/blog/2013/09/06/a-field-guide-to-procrastinators/
Nor administering a dose of
https://www.flickr.com/photos/116357579@N08/13178367583
Procrastinators are NOT lazy
https://www.flickr.com/photos/code_martial/4145914957
The unknown can be paralyzing
http://hub.salford.ac.uk/energymonitoring/wp-content/uploads/sites/7/2012/01/known-knowns1.jpg
Pro tip! http://www.flickr.com/photos/jonmelsa/3000222387/
Increase the meaning/value http://www.flickr.com/photos/eyeliam/2460475510/
Mind Tricks https://www.flickr.com/photos/32135758@N02/5325454434/
Don’t do it, just get ready to Photo: Denise Jacobs
“Structured procrastination” https://www.flickr.com/photos/superamit/1043379069
Time & Space Tricks http://www.flickr.com/photos/indraw/4857101224/
Eliminate distractions
From “Shit Black Girls Say”, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fXDpfhehb6I
Ignore to focus
Tools RescueTime.com HeyFocus.com
Browser Extensions Firefox: LeechBlock Idderall Google Chrome: Strict Workflow StayFocusd Website Blocker
Aids for digital blocking
Added bonus HeyFocus.com
Airplane/Do Not Disturb mode
http://www.flickr.com/photos/pieterouwerkerk/699475144/
Make it a Sprint
http://www.flickr.com/photos/lucamascaro/4975166968/
Fill a Quota
https://www.flickr.com/photos/teosaurio/3392883329/
Remember this Photo: Denise Jacobs
My story’s end? http://www.flickr.com/photos/sonialuna/2942020058/
February http://www.flickr.com/photos/doug88888/3709856898/
#FAIL https://www.flickr.com/photos/dafnecholet/5374200948
#WINNING! http://www.flickr.com/photos/clappstar/6297835482/
I wrote my first book! Photo: Denise Jacobs
https://www.flickr.com/photos/thatconference/9532425040/
Which created AMAZING things for me
Bad dreams https://www.flickr.com/photos/agroffman/4613265988
My own inner creative child Photo: Deloria Jacobs
Always reaching for perfection Photo: Denise Jacobs
“The rule is, jam to-morrow and jam yesterday—but never jam to-day.”
“It MUST come sometimes to ‘jam to-day’,” Alice objected.
“No, it can’t,” said the Queen. “It’s jam every OTHER day: to-day isn’t any OTHER day, you know.”
— from Through the Looking Glass & What Alice Found There, by Lewis Carroll
“Jam” = Reward / Satisfaction https://www.flickr.com/photos/macati/2180421766
YOU NEVER GET JAM http://www.alice-in-wonderland.net/alicepic/through-the-looking-glass/2book42.jpg
By sharing my experience Photo: Deloria Jacobs
Show you there is an alternative https://www.flickr.com/photos/buttersponge/4955768144
https://www.flickr.com/photos/9422878@N08/9220121158/
“The creative adult is the child who survived after the world tried killing them, making them ‘grown up’….
…The creative adult is the child who survived the blandness of schooling, the unhelpful words of bad teachers, and the nay-saying ways of the world.” – Ursula K. L Guin
https://www.flickr.com/photos/theburiedlife/2167001643/
By understanding this truth
You’ll look at yourself differently https://www.flickr.com/photos/edenpictures/3460562429
Your imperfect, amazing ideas
http://www.flickr.com/photos/bcymet/3564484236/
Because, after all…
https://www.flickr.com/photos/aoberg/9652158212
The End Photo: Denise Jacobs
THE CREATIVE DOSE A Creativity + Innovation Collective
Work Better. Create More. Create Betterness.
Creative Thinking & Problem-solving Applying an Innovation Mindset
Creative Collaboration Team Communication & Cohesion
TheCreativeDose.com @thecreativedose
My upcoming book! Banish Your Inner Critic
DeniseJacobs.com/InnerCritic
26 Effective Techniques for Unleashing Productive Creativity
Get the slides!
Creativedo.se/hidcbos-ic
DeniseJacobs.com à Sign up on my mailing list!
twitter.com/denisejacobs
facebook.com/denisejacobsdotcom
slideshare.net/denisejacobs
Connect! + Collaborate!
Photo used with permission: http://www.flickr.com/photos/aarronwalter/4629078087/
Thank you! http://www.flickr.com/photos/theredproject/3302110152/