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Approaches to Conflict What we want the end result to be determines how we go about dealing with conflict 1- Lose-Lose 2- Win-Lose 3- Win-Win

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Page 1: Approaches to Conflict What we want the end result to be determines how we go about dealing with conflict 1- Lose-Lose 2- Win-Lose 3- Win-Win

Approaches to Conflict

What we want the end result to be determines how

we go about dealing with conflict

1- Lose-Lose2- Win-Lose

3- Win-Win

Page 2: Approaches to Conflict What we want the end result to be determines how we go about dealing with conflict 1- Lose-Lose 2- Win-Lose 3- Win-Win

1- Lose-Lose

Lose for everyone

At core of this attitude is a belief that conflict is bad and unhealthy and

destructive for everyone

Lose for everyone

At core of this attitude is a belief thatconflict is bad and unhealthy and

destructive for everyone

Page 3: Approaches to Conflict What we want the end result to be determines how we go about dealing with conflict 1- Lose-Lose 2- Win-Lose 3- Win-Win

2- Win-Lose 2- Win-Lose

One person wins at expense of other

One person wins at expense of other

Page 4: Approaches to Conflict What we want the end result to be determines how we go about dealing with conflict 1- Lose-Lose 2- Win-Lose 3- Win-Win

Competitive vs Cooperating

Belief in arguments as battles and therefore have a winner

Occasionally positiveWhen you don’t care about the other person Buying a car – don’t care about salesman’s profit

Belief in arguments as battles and therefore have a winner

Occasionally positiveWhen you don’t care about the other person Buying a car – don’t care about salesman’s profit

Page 5: Approaches to Conflict What we want the end result to be determines how we go about dealing with conflict 1- Lose-Lose 2- Win-Lose 3- Win-Win

3-Win-Win (Both win)

3-Win-Win (Both win)

Ideally everyone feels it is the best possible solution

Ideally everyone feels it is the best possible solution

Page 6: Approaches to Conflict What we want the end result to be determines how we go about dealing with conflict 1- Lose-Lose 2- Win-Lose 3- Win-Win

Not always idealNot always ideal

Each person makes accommodations to fit into the

others ideasBoth people give up a part of what you want to achieve some positive

result

Each person makes accommodations to fit into the

others ideasBoth people give up a part of what you want to achieve some positive

result

Page 7: Approaches to Conflict What we want the end result to be determines how we go about dealing with conflict 1- Lose-Lose 2- Win-Lose 3- Win-Win

Responses to conflict

1- EXIT response 2- NEGLECT response 3- LOYALTY response 4- VOICE response

Page 8: Approaches to Conflict What we want the end result to be determines how we go about dealing with conflict 1- Lose-Lose 2- Win-Lose 3- Win-Win

1- EXIT response

Leaving a relationship either physically or emotionally

Refusing to talk about a problem

Lose-Lose and Win-Lose orientation people

Page 9: Approaches to Conflict What we want the end result to be determines how we go about dealing with conflict 1- Lose-Lose 2- Win-Lose 3- Win-Win

2- NEGLECT response

Denies or minimizes problems arguments, anger, tensions that could

lead to conflicttries to suggest problem doesn’t exist

or isn’t that big of a deal

Lose-Lose and Win-Lose orientation people

Page 10: Approaches to Conflict What we want the end result to be determines how we go about dealing with conflict 1- Lose-Lose 2- Win-Lose 3- Win-Win

3 -LOYALTY response

Staying committed to a relationship despite differences

To tolerate the differences rather than fix them

Focusing on what is good in relationship

Lose-Lose orientation people

Page 11: Approaches to Conflict What we want the end result to be determines how we go about dealing with conflict 1- Lose-Lose 2- Win-Lose 3- Win-Win

4 -VOICE response

Is an active constructive strategy Talking about problems and trying to

solve them Identify problems and try to solve

them Most constructive

Win-Win orientation people

Page 12: Approaches to Conflict What we want the end result to be determines how we go about dealing with conflict 1- Lose-Lose 2- Win-Lose 3- Win-Win

Climate The climate in which

conflict is managed is important

Defensive Climate

Supportive Climate

Page 13: Approaches to Conflict What we want the end result to be determines how we go about dealing with conflict 1- Lose-Lose 2- Win-Lose 3- Win-Win

Defensive climate

1- Evaluation: judging and criticizing other group members.

2 -Control: imposing the will of one group member on the others .

3 -Strategy: using hidden agendas .4 -Neutrality: demonstrating indifference

and lack of commitment .5 -Superiority: expressing dominance .

6 -Certainty: being rigid in one's willingness to listen to others.

Page 14: Approaches to Conflict What we want the end result to be determines how we go about dealing with conflict 1- Lose-Lose 2- Win-Lose 3- Win-Win

Supportive Climate

1- Description: presenting ideas or opinions. 2- Problem orientation: focusing attention on the task. 3- Spontaneity: communicating openly and honestly. 4- Empathy: understanding another person's thoughts. 5- Equality: asking for opinions. 6- Professionalism: expressing a willingness to listen to the ideas of others.

Page 15: Approaches to Conflict What we want the end result to be determines how we go about dealing with conflict 1- Lose-Lose 2- Win-Lose 3- Win-Win

Sometimes it's easier to change people ...

By listening, than by making arguments

Sometimes all you must do to understand ...

Is just be very quiet

Giving someone freedom ...To do only what you want them to

do is not freedom

Page 16: Approaches to Conflict What we want the end result to be determines how we go about dealing with conflict 1- Lose-Lose 2- Win-Lose 3- Win-Win

The most important trip you

may take in life 

The most important trip you

may take in life 

Page 17: Approaches to Conflict What we want the end result to be determines how we go about dealing with conflict 1- Lose-Lose 2- Win-Lose 3- Win-Win

If the only tool you have is a hammer, you tend to treat everything as if it

were a nail Maslow

If the only tool you have is a hammer, you tend to treat everything as if it

were a nail Maslow

Page 18: Approaches to Conflict What we want the end result to be determines how we go about dealing with conflict 1- Lose-Lose 2- Win-Lose 3- Win-Win

الل�ه� ي� ض ر� ع�لي� عنع�ن�ه� : ت�ع�ال�ى

ا م� رئ� ام� ك�ل� ة� يم� قن� ي�ح�س

Page 19: Approaches to Conflict What we want the end result to be determines how we go about dealing with conflict 1- Lose-Lose 2- Win-Lose 3- Win-Win

الله صلى للنبي قال رجال أن : ال قال أوصني وسلم عليه

تغضب ال قال مرارا فردد تغضب

ع�ل�ي�ه الل�ه� ل�ى ص� الل�ه ول� س� ر� ال� ق�ل�م� : و�س�

ه س� ن�ف� غ�ل�ب� م�ن� ديد� الش�

ل�م� و�س� ع�ل�ي�ه الل�ه� ل�ى ص� الن�بي� عنال� : ق� ن�ه�

� أل� في ال�ع�ق� ل�ب ن�ور: ق� ال�ق� ر� ي�ف�

ال�ب�اطل و� ق� ال�ح� ب�ي�ن�

Page 20: Approaches to Conflict What we want the end result to be determines how we go about dealing with conflict 1- Lose-Lose 2- Win-Lose 3- Win-Win

ت�ؤ�د?وا” أ�ن� ك�م� ر� م�ي�أ� الل�ه� إن�

ذ�ا إ و� ا له� ه�أ� ل�ى إ ان�ات م�

� األ�أ�ن� الن�اس ب�ي�ن� ت�م� ك�م� ح�الل�ه� إن� بال�ع�د�ل ك�م�وا ت�ح�الل�ه� إن� به ي�عظ�ك�م� ا نعم�

ا Mير ب�ص يعMا م س� ”ك�ان�

ك�ون�وا ” ن�وا آم� ال�ذين� ا ي?ه�� أ ي�ا

ط س� بال�ق د�اء� ه� ش� لل�ه ين� و�ام ق�و�م� ق� ن�آن� ش� ن�ك�م� رم� ي�ج� و�ال�و� ه� اع�دل�وا ت�ع�دل�وا ال�

أ� ع�ل�ى“ الل�ه� وا ات�ق� و� و�ى للت�ق� ب� ر� ق�

أ�

Page 21: Approaches to Conflict What we want the end result to be determines how we go about dealing with conflict 1- Lose-Lose 2- Win-Lose 3- Win-Win

من�” و�اغ�ض�ض� يك� م�ش� في د� و�اق�صو�ت� ل�ص� و�ات ص�

� األ� ن�ك�ر�� أ إن� تك� و� ص�

ير م “ال�ح�

و�ال�” و�ى الت�ق� و� ال�بر� ع�ل�ى ن�وا ت�ع�او� و�ال�ع�د�و�ان و� ث�م اإل� ع�ل�ى ن�وا ت�ع�او�

ديد� ش� الل�ه� إن� الل�ه� وا ات�ق� “و�

يعMا ” م ج� الل�ه ب�ل بح� وا م� و�اع�ت�صالل�ه ة� نع�م� وا اذ�ك�ر� و� وا ق� ر� ت�ف� و�ال�

أ�ل�ف� ف� Mأ�ع�د�اء ك�ن�ت�م� ذ� إ ع�ل�ي�ك�م�ته بنع�م� ت�م� ب�ح� ص�

أ� ف� ل�وبك�م� ق� ب�ي�ن�انMا“ و� إخ�

Page 22: Approaches to Conflict What we want the end result to be determines how we go about dealing with conflict 1- Lose-Lose 2- Win-Lose 3- Win-Win

دين” لي� و� دين�ك�م� ”ل�ك�م�

ب�ع�د” من� م� ان�ه� ي�م�� أ ن�ك�ث�وا إن� و�

دينك�م� في و�ط�ع�ن�وا دهم� ع�ه�ال� م� ن�ه� إ ر ال�ك�ف� ة� ئم�

� أ اتل�وا ق� ف�” ون� ي�ن�ت�ه� م� ل�ع�ل�ه� م� ل�ه� ان� ي�م�

� أ

Page 23: Approaches to Conflict What we want the end result to be determines how we go about dealing with conflict 1- Lose-Lose 2- Win-Lose 3- Win-Win

د� ” ق� ال� ق� بال�ب�ي�ن�ات ى عيس� اء� ج� ا ل�م� و�ب ئ�ت�ك�م� ة ج ك�م� ب�ع�ض� ال�ح ل�ك�م� ب�ي�ن�

� و�ألالل�ه� وا ات�ق� ف� يه ف ون� ت�لف� ت�خ� ال�ذي

طيع�ونأ� ”و�

ب�ك� ” ر� بيل س� إل�ى ةاد�ع� ك�م� بال�حو�عظ�ة ال�م� ن�ة و� س� م�و�ال�ح� ادل�ه� بال�تي ج�

ن�هي� ح�س�ن� أ� بم� ع�ل�م�

أ� و� ه� ب�ك� ر� إن�ع�ل�م�

أ� و� و�ه� بيله س� ع�ن� ل� ض�” ت�دين� ه� بال�م�

Page 24: Approaches to Conflict What we want the end result to be determines how we go about dealing with conflict 1- Lose-Lose 2- Win-Lose 3- Win-Win

هي�” ال�تي ول�وا ي�ق� لعب�ادي ل� ن�و�ق� ح�س�إن� أ�

ك�ان� ي�ط�ان� الش� إن� م� ب�ي�ن�ه� غ� ي�ن�ز� ي�ط�ان� الش�“ بينMا م� ع�د�وhا ان ن�س� لإل�

ي�ت�بع�ون�” ف� و�ل� ال�ق� ع�ون� ت�م ي�س� ن�ه�ال�ذين� س� ح� أ�

أ�ول�و ه�م� ول�ئك�أ� و� الل�ه� د�اه�م� ه� ال�ذين� ول�ئك�

أ��ل�ب�اب ”األ�

هي�" �ل�تي با ع� ح�س�ن اد�ف�ب�ي�نك أ� ال�ذي إذ�ا ف�

“ ميم ح� lيل و� ن�ه�� ك�أ ع�د�او�ة ب�ي�نه و�

في ” ض� ر�� و�األ� او�ات م� الس� ل�ق� خ� ال�ذي و� و�ه�

لي�ب�ل�و�ك�م� اء ال�م� ع�ل�ى ه� ش� ع�ر� و�ك�ان� ي�ام�� أ ت�ة س

ي?ك�م� � ن�أ ح�س�

“أ� Mال ع�م�

Page 25: Approaches to Conflict What we want the end result to be determines how we go about dealing with conflict 1- Lose-Lose 2- Win-Lose 3- Win-Win

الد�ي�ه ” بو� ان� ن�س� اإل� ي�ن�ا نMاو�و�ص� س� ح�ل�ي�س� ا م� بي رك� لت�ش� د�اك� اه� ج� إن� و�

ل�ي� إ ا م� ت�طع�ه� ال� ف� ل�م: ع به ل�ك�ك�ن�ت�م� ا بم� ن�ب�ئ�ك�م�

� أ ف� ع�ك�م� ج ر� م�” ل�ون� ت�ع�م�العنكبوت

في” م�ا ب�ه� اح و�ص� ا م� ت�طع�ه� ال� ف�“ ا Mوف ع�ر� م� الد?ن�ي�ا

لقمان

Page 26: Approaches to Conflict What we want the end result to be determines how we go about dealing with conflict 1- Lose-Lose 2- Win-Lose 3- Win-Win

الد�ار� الل�ه� آت�اك� ا يم� ف اب�ت�غ و�ن� م يب�ك� ن�ص ت�ن�س� و�ال� ة� ر� خ اآل�

و� ن�الد?ن�ي�ا ح�سن� أ� ح�س�

أ� ا ك�م�اد� س� ال�ف� ت�ب�غ و�ال� ل�ي�ك� إ الل�ه�

ب? ي�ح ال� الل�ه� إن� ض ر�� األ� في

دين� س ”ال�م�ف�

Page 27: Approaches to Conflict What we want the end result to be determines how we go about dealing with conflict 1- Lose-Lose 2- Win-Lose 3- Win-Win

There is no one best way to deal

with conflictIt depends on the current situation

Page 28: Approaches to Conflict What we want the end result to be determines how we go about dealing with conflict 1- Lose-Lose 2- Win-Lose 3- Win-Win

The reasons we use different styles varies

We often avoid when we don't want to get involved or we

decide it's not worth the effort to pursue.

It's important to "pick your battles" since they can't all be

fought and won.

Page 29: Approaches to Conflict What we want the end result to be determines how we go about dealing with conflict 1- Lose-Lose 2- Win-Lose 3- Win-Win

We compete when we strongly believe in our

ideas. We accommodate when

we want others to like us or we like things to run

smoothly or we don't feel like we have the right to remind others of their

responsibilities

Page 30: Approaches to Conflict What we want the end result to be determines how we go about dealing with conflict 1- Lose-Lose 2- Win-Lose 3- Win-Win

We often compromise when we are in a hurry.

We use collaboration when we want everyone

involved to feel "ownership" for the

outcome

Page 31: Approaches to Conflict What we want the end result to be determines how we go about dealing with conflict 1- Lose-Lose 2- Win-Lose 3- Win-Win