12 Steps to Living Well Kevin Bungert

Kevin Bungert is the owner, head coach and motivation behind Living Well Systems, Inc., a personal motivation and coaching company located in East Northport, NY. LWS caters to real estate sales professionals, and helps agents create more business, which creates more profit, which creates a better life for the agent and their family.

LWS was founded by Kevin in 2005 after a 14 year career as real estate professional. After obtaining his real estate license in 1994, Kevin quickly became the top producing agent at Century 21 Vipen in Kings Park, NY and opened his first office in his home town of East Northport, NY in 1996.

In 2003, Kevin opened his second Century 21 Family Real Estate in the beautiful town of Northport, NY, and during his time as broker and owner of Century 21 Family, Kevin hired and trained over 150 agents, bringing several of them to the top designation of Centurion.

12 Steps to Living Well

1. Define Your Purpose 2. Be Honest With Yourself 3. Define Your Short Term Goals 4. Stay Positive and Believe In Yourself 5. Learn New Information 6. Make Different Choices 7. Take Action 8. Reprogram Your Negative Self Talk 9. Make New Associations 10. Refine - Continually Try To Improve 11. Help Others

12. Don’t Be Afraid

1. Define Your Purpose

Over the years I have developed 12 steps that I use in my coaching business to help peo-ple improve the problem areas of their lives. I would like to share these 12 ideas with you today:

1. Define Your Purpose 2. Be Honest With Yourself 3. Define Your Short Term Goals 4. Stay Positive and Believe In Yourself 5. Learn New Information 6. Make Different Choices 7. Take Action 8. Reprogram Your Negative Self Talk 9. Make New Associations 10. Refine - Continually Try To Improve 11. Help Others

12. Don’t Be Afraid

Step #1, DEFINE YOUR PURPOSE, when I mention this step in my seminars, people always look at me a little weird. Define your purpose? Who talks like that? What the hell does that mean? I just came in for the free coffee and donuts! And you want me to define my purpose in life? Yes I do! I ACTUALLY want you to think about your purpose in this life. What are you trying to accomplish? What do you want to be remembered for? By whom do you want to be remembered by? What would you like to achieve? Who would you like to help?

Now I know this is pretty serious stuff for a Monday morning, but if you never actually think about these things, you'll proba-bly never get where you REALLY want to go. Setting your sights on what you really would like to achieve is the first step in getting it done. Have you ever reached a significant goal in your life without first deciding that you wanted to accomplish it? I never have and I've never seen anyone else do it either. All the significant and life changing goals I have reached in my life, I first decided that I wanted them to happen. What about you? Think back, have you ever stumbled upon something really worthwhile? I doubt it!

All significant life changes and goals, begin at the same place, with a decision by you to make something happen in your life. Whether it be in real estate, or your health or in your relationships, you MUST first decide what it is you would like to accom-plish and you must be able to communicate it to yourself and anyone else you would like to share it with. DEFINE YOUR PUR-POSE, what is it that you REALLY want to accomplish in life, in your business, with regards to your health, with regards to your family and friends? Can you define the things in your life that you want to accomplish?

If not, take this opportunity today and try this challenge. Go somewhere quiet, bring a pen and your journal and start to write down EXACTLY what you would love to see happen in your life, in every area of your life. Don't be afraid! It's okay to think

like this, we're allowed to want more in our lives, even if our lives are ALREADY great, there is ALWAYS another level of achievement for us, just look at Oprah, she is always reaching and striving for more and because she can DEFINE what she wants, she can make it happen.

I hope you take the time and do this exercise, it is the first step in ANY significant life change. Start to practice taking some quiet time for yourself and begin to think what YOU want out of this life. Because we only get one chance, there are no "Do Overs".

Start living your life more fully today!

“What is it that you REALLY want to accomplish in life, in your business, with regards to your health, with regards to your family and friends?”

2. Be Honest With Yourself

Here once again are my 12 Steps To Living Well. These 12 ideas will help you improve any

area of your life that is causing you pain, it could be a relationship, your business, your

weight, it doesn't matter what the problem is. these 12 ideas can help you if you put

them into practice in the area of your life that's causing you problems.

Today I would like to talk about step #2 - BE HONEST WITH YOURSELF. Along with step #4,

this is probably the hardest thing for people to do on this list. Most people really don't

want to be completely honest about themselves and their lives. Because if we were, than

the world would see that maybe we aren't so smart. But the ONLY way to make something

in your life better, is to take responsibility for your life right now, as it is. It's alright, no-

body's perfect. I certainly know that I'm not! We have ALL made our share of mistakes, I

know that I have made plenty in my life. And I'm going to make others, it's part of the hu-

man experience!

However, if you want to start to make your life better in a certain area, than we MUST

take responsibility for our mistakes and we must take responsibility for our lives as they

are! We made ALL the choices that have led us to where we are right now. Did you CHOOSE

to go to college? Did you CHOOSE where you went? Did you CHOOSE to date who you dated?

Did you CHOOSE who you married? Are CHOOSING to stay married? Did you CHOOSE the

place that you live in? Did you CHOOSE to have children? Did you CHOOSE real estate as a

career? Did you CHOOSE the office you work in? You get the point!

Stop blaming someone else for YOUR circumstances, your CHOICES equals your LIFE! BE HONEST WITH YOURSELF! Because

when you are, than you take back TOTAL control of your life. When you're honest with yourself, at least you know where

you're starting from. How's your business? Be honest, do you work as hard as you could? Do you spend as much time on it as

you should? Do you look for ideas to make it better? Ask your self the tough questions, but be honest when you answer, be-

cause if you're not, you're only fooling yourself!

I always relate it to playing golf. Do you know how many people LIE about their score in golf? A LOT! My brother Jimmy does it

all the time! What's the point? It doesn't ACTUALLY make you a better golfer, lessons make you a better golfer, playing with

better players makes you a better golfer, reading and studying makes you a better golfer, trying to be a better golfer will

make you a better golfer. Lying about your score only harms you! It's the same in every area of our lives! If we aren't honest

with ourselves about our businesses, our relationships, our health, etc. Who are we REALLY fooling?

I have lied to myself about things in my life for a long time, I no longer do

that. I have taken complete responsibility for my life, my many mistakes

and all, sometimes it's still not very pretty, but I wouldn't have it any other

way! If you want to improve an area of your life that is causing you pain,

be honest with yourself about how you got there, then forgive yourself,

and then begin working on making it better.

It's the ONLY way to start!

“Stop blaming someone else for YOUR circumstances, your CHOICES equals your LIFE! BE HONEST WITH YOURSELF! Because when you are, than you take back TOTAL control of your life.”

3. Define Your Short Term Goals

I'm back today writing about my 12 Steps to Living Well. Have you thought about the first

two steps? I hope you've had a chance to take some time and ponder them. Well, today

I'm going to talk about Step #3, Define Your Short Term Goals.

Okay, step #3 is Define Your Short Term Goals. Everybody has goals, whether you write them down or not, you have goals. For example, without writing it down every month, you want to pay your mortgage, right? You want to eat healthy, right? You want to be in a loving relationship, right? You want some fun in your life, right? You get the idea. We ALL have goals. But what takes us from where we are right now in our lives and our unwritten goals, to a better life and achieving more for our-selves and our loved ones, is FOCUS.

I heard Steadman Graham say something on Larry King one night I'll never forget, he said, "Whatever you FOCUS on, expands." Whatever we focus on, expands, whether it be good or bad. Anything we continuously put in our sights ex-pands. So if we continuously put our goals in our minds, we will go about making them happen. A study by Dr. Shad Helmstetter and Harvard University showed that a goal that someone has that is not written down has a 6 or 7% chance of being accomplished. However, if we take the very small step of just writing down our goals, the chances of those goals being accomplished rises to 70 to 80%! That's unbelievable! Because once we WRITE our goals, we have begun the process of FOCUSING on them. Whatever we FOCUS on expands! You already knew this to be true, you really didn't just learn that from me. Think about your life, every time you REALLY FOCUSED on something, I’ll bet you accomplished it. Would I win that bet?

Short term goals I define as things you would like to accomplish in a years time or so. The things that really make your life better on a daily basis. It could be shorter though, maybe one of your short term goals will be accomplished in a few days or weeks, don't get hung up on the time something will take, just begin writing down the goals you would really like to accom-plish. I would like to share my goals with you for this year.

1. Maintain my weight of 180 lbs. 2. Make $200,000.00 from Living Well Systems, Inc. 3. Go skydiving twice. 4. Save $15,000.00 for retirement. 5. Go to Hawaii with my family in November. 6. Work on "Mary's Race for Quitters" - A road race in tribute to my sister Mary who passed away last year. 7. Finish "It's Going to be Okay!" - A book I'm writing. 8. Go to Graceland with Kimberly. - Who doesn't love "The King?" 9. Run the Long Island Marathon in May. 10. Get the "Ellipti-Trike" produced - a piece of exercise equipment I’ve designed. 11. Try out for "Everyday Edisons." - A PBS show for inventors. 12. Live each and every day fully! - I do try and do that!

As you can see, my goals are very specific and written down. These are the things that I would like to accomplish this year. Will I? I don't know, but I can tell you one thing from previous years, I'll get SOME of them done! And that's the point! Whatever we FOCUS on, EXPANDS! So focus on your short term goals, take some time and go some where quiet and think about what you would like to ac-complish this year. WRITE down your goals and begin focusing on them and mak-ing them happen. If you look back on your life, you've ALREADY done this.

And I guarantee, you can do it AGAIN!

“Whatever you FOCUS on, expands.”

~ Steadman Graham

4. Believe in Yourself and Stay Positive

Good Morning Everyone! I would like to share step #4 with you today of my 12 Steps to

Living Well. Remember, these 12 ideas can help you in any area of life, they're not exclu-

sive to improving our real estate businesses. Try these ideas on an area of your life that

needs a little help, and I'm sure you'll begin to see a difference.

Out of all 12 steps, this one may be the hardest for us to consistently do. Why do you think that is? It's very simple actually, because of ALL of the negative programming we have received in our lives and continue to receive on a daily basis. I'm sorry if this post may be a little harsher than any other post I’ve written, but I REALLY love to talk about this issue!

Unfortunately, the truth about most people is they don't want to see you succeed. Most people don't want you to step up and out of your circumstances. Most people don't want to see you improving your life. Why? What do they care how your life is going? Well, the answer is, if you step up and improve your life, then what does that say about them? They don't want you to be better, because than they would have to work at being better. And they don't want to work that hard or they simply can't.

But don't worry about them, worry about you! Decide what it is you want to accomplish in life and don't let anyone else dis-tract you. Stay FOCUSED on your ideas and your goals and let all the others be negative. Stay away from all the negative peo-ple, FAR AWAY! And I know there are a lot of them, you probably work with a dozen or so, and you might even live with one or two. But that doesn't mean you have to think like them. Think for yourself, who cares what the negative people say? What have they ever accomplished? Where are they going? ABSOLUTELY NOWHERE!

Be different, be bold, be courageous, be strong, and most importantly, STAY POSITIVE! Don't listen to the whiners, listen to the achiev-ers. Associate with the leaders, the top producers, the givers. Be like them. Listen to them, look for people who have achieved what you want to achieve, and listen to their advice. Close your mind to the know it alls. They don't know anything! Search out REAL achievement. Train your mind to think success. Train your mind to stay positive. Believe in your-self, it's your life! Do what you want to do. Achieve what you want to achieve. Chase the dreams that you have. Forget all the people who will tell you can't, what they really mean is THEY can't. But the truth is, YOU CAN! Many already have, and you are on your way to joining them.

Just believe in yourself and listen to the ACHIEVERS, not the whiners!

“Whether you think you can or think you can't, you're right!” - Henry Ford

“Any fool can condemn, criticize and complain. And most fools do!”- Andrew Carnegie

5. Learn New Information

Here is the 5th step on our list of 12 ideas that can help you improve any area of your

life. This step relates very well to real estate sales. If you want to have a better real es-

tate business, you MUST learn how to do that. Just like we all need to learn how to do

something that is new to us, we all need to learn how to grow our businesses to the next

level.

The reason we must LEARN NEW INFORMATION is because the knowl-edge we have right now has only gotten us to the level of production that we are at right now. We want to learn how to do MORE BUSINESS!

There is no shortage of very valuable information out there for ANY Realtor who wants to improve their businesses. If you want to learn how to do more business by referral, attend a Brian Buffini seminar. If you want to do more business with a personal ad campaign, attend a Hobbs-Herder seminar. If you would like to do more business with FSBO's, buy and read Gary Keller's book "The Millionaire Real Estate Agent." If you would like to do more business by staying on track and motivated, hire a coach!

And these are just a few examples. There are hundreds of ways to improve your business by learning new information. But it is up to you! You would not be reading this post, if you didn't take your business seriously and truly want it to be more.

Search out the trainers who you would like to hear speak. Read all the books you need to. Talk with as many top producers you can. Sit with your manager and pick her brain. If you really want your business to be more, you must LEARN how to take it to the next level. There is NO SHORTAGE of great information out there to help you run a better business, only a shortage of people who take advantage of it. ALWAYS be learning! ALWAYS be searching!

Do the work that will take your business to the next level, you'll never regret learning all the won-derful new ideas to help your business!

“If you really want your business to be more, you must LEARN how to take it to the next level. ”

6. Make Different Choices

Well, we are now half way through our list of 12 Steps to Living Well. Today I would like

to talk a little bit about step #6: MAKE DIFFERENT CHOICES.

Since we are now half way down our list, think about an area of your life you want to improve. Would the first 6 steps help you? Have you decided to give them a try? I sure hope so, because I've seen them work many times.

Step #6, MAKE DIFFERENT CHOICES, is where the changes begin to happen. I'm sure all of you have heard this definition of insanity, to always do the same things and expect different results. Well, I don't believe that is a definition of insanity. I do however, believe it is a viable definition for the status quo, for complacency, for mediocrity and for laziness.

After you have defined your goals, learned some new information, it is time to make some different choices. Remember, EVERYTHING IS A CHOICE! AND I MEAN EVERYTHING! What time do you choose to get in the office. What do you choose to do once you get there? How much time do you choose to spend talking with your co-workers? How much time do you choose to generate new business? Do you choose how to learn to make your business better? Are you choosing to emulate the top producers you know?

THE CHOICES YOU HAVE MADE TO THIS POINT WITH YOUR BUSINESS, HAVE GOTTEN YOU WHERE YOU ARE NOW, ARE YOU OKAY WITH THAT? If not, make different choices. Try something new, try something differ-ent, try something unique. Following the herd is a SURE WAY TO MEDI-OCRITY! Think for yourself when it comes to YOUR BUSINESS! Get all the new information you can and MAKE DIFFERENT CHOICES!

Your business can change dramatically if you CHOOSE TO MAKE IT HAPPEN!

“The choices you have made to this point with your business have gotten you where you are now, are you okay with that? ”

7. Take Action

If you have been following our list of 12 ideas that can help you improve a problem area

of your life, we are at the most important step, TAKE ACTION!

Simply put, the single most important step on this list is to TAKE ACTION! The other 11 steps on this list WILL NOT get you very far, if you never TAKE ACTION. Have you ever known someone who talked a good game, but really wasn't all that impres-sive? And have you ever met someone who talked very little about his accomplishments, and really kicked A**! The difference between these two people is TAKING ACTION!

Benjamin Franklin said, "Well done is better than well said." We can define our goals, stay positive, learn new information and make different choices all day long, but NOT UNTIL WE TAKE ACTION, will our lives begin to change.

Jim Rohn, the business philosopher, has a great line about TAKING ACTION, he says, "Action is where the miracles take place." I couldn't agree more. If you want something in your life to change, you have to make it happen. YOU have to make it hap-pen. No one can do it for you. You need to stand up and TAKE ACTION!

For example, if you want to make more money this year, how are you going to do it. Is hoping go-ing to get it done? Is wishing going to make it happen? OF COURSE NOT! YOU ARE GOING TO MAKE IT HAPPEN! You're going to make more money this year, because you're going to work harder, you're going to work smarter, you're going to learn new lead generation systems, you're going to pay attention to the top producers, you're going to invest more resources in your busi-ness, in short, you're going to TAKE ACTIONS TO MAKE YOUR BUSINESS BETTER!

I'd like to share with you one of my best examples I have about taking action, from my own life. A few years ago, I decided I wanted to host my own motivational radio show. I had never been on the radio and knew NOTHING ABOUT DOING A RADIO SHOW. But once I decide something, I usually don't let go. So I had my assistant Christine look up all the radio stations on Long Island, which she did and she gave me a list of addresses and phone numbers.

The next day, I took that list and went and visited a half dozen or so stations, asking to talk with the appropriate person about hosting my own radio show. I did not get to see anyone that day, but I left my contact information at every station. The next day, I got two calls from radio sta-tions. Both told me they had ways for me to do my own show. So the next day, I went and met with these two stations and listened how I could get on the radio. I took their information and over night I thought about which station would be right for me.

The next day, I called back WLIE and told them I wanted to go ahead and book my show. I went in that afternoon and signed the paperwork. It took me all of 4 days to get a radio show. That is taking action to get something you want. I went on the air 2 weeks later and I loved every minute of it.

I am ABSOLUTELY NO DIFFERENT THAN YOU! You too could have a radio show in 4 days, if that is what you wanted. You have already done this stuff many times in your life before. Think of a time that you TOOK ACTION and got what you wanted. How did it make you feel?

I'm sure it was wonderful. Now, we just need to do the same thing today to get the desired results in our lives. If we want our lives to be better, there is only one sure fire way for that to happen.

WE MUST TAKE ACTION! THAT’S WHERE THE GREAT STUFF IS!

“Well done is better than well said.” - Ben Franklin

8. Re-Program Your Negative Self Talk

This one is HARD! This step is a tough one, we ALL struggle with it from time to time.

But we can start to make an improvement by working at it.

Have you ever called yourself FAT, LAZY, STUPID, SILLY, UNORGANIZED, OLD, DISGUSTING, OR A LOSER? Well, that's negative self talk! And we have ALL done it, to some degree or other. The sad part is, it's so damaging. We call ourselves names all the time, that if other people said it, we would be really hurt!

Where does this type of thinking come from? Unfortunately, we were programmed with it by our parents, our teachers, our coaches, our friends, the media! Think back, has some-thing someone said to you as a child still stick with you? If you're like most people the answer is yes. Well as adults, it is up to us to STOP OUR NEGATIVE SELF TALK AND RE-PLACE IT WITH MORE HELPFUL THOUGHTS!

Dr. Shad Helmstetter has written a wonderful book on this subject, titled, "WHAT TO SAY WHEN YOU TALK TO YOURSELF." It is an absolute must read if you want to make positive changes in your life. Dr. Helmstetter believes that ALL faults and failures are a result of our negative programming. And that we can overcome this programming by acknowledging when we're doing it, stopping ourselves and replacing it with a more positive thought.

Dr. Helmstetter writes that our subconscious mind will go to work on making whatever we tell it to be a reality. For example, if I ALWAYS say to myself, "I can't lose weight, I have no will power." What do you think will happen? Of course I'll never lose any weight, I KEEP TELLING MYSELF THAT I CAN'T! Dr. Hem-stetter's entire book is a complete dissection of the Henry Ford saying of "WHETHER YOU THINK YOU CAN OR THINK YOU CAN'T, YOU'RE RIGHT!"

Our subconscious mind DOES NOT KNOW THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A POSITIVE THOUGHT OR A NEGATIVE THOUGHT! It will just go to work on making whatever I'm telling it to, happen. But that's the GOOD NEWS! If it doesn't know the differ-ence between positive and negative thoughts, than we just need to give it more positive thoughts!

So, if you would like to lose weight, stop telling yourself that you can't and begin saying things like, "I will eat healthier foods everyday." Or, "I have all the will power necessary to lose weight and maintain my good health." Or even better yet, run out today and buy Dr. Helmstetter's book and get ALL THE POSITIVE SELF TALK for every area of your life!

If you have ever heard BRIAN BUFFINI speak, he will tell you that this book, is the one book that helped him the most on his journey of self improvement! I agree with Brian 100%, this a great book and I and try to implement it's ideas in my life every-day. Do I always succeed? Of course not, we're all human, but I know when I fail and I stop myself, and I get right back on the right track!

Like Henry Ford said, "WHETHER YOU THINK YOU CAN OR THINK YOU CAN'T, YOU'RE RIGHT!" I like to think I can!

“Whether you think you can or you think you can’t, you’re right!” - Henry Ford

9. Make New Associations

I will tell you right upfront, I'm writing this post to MYSELF! This is my weakest area on

this list. I am trying to get better, but I have a ways to go!

As I said, this is my biggest weakness on this list. I have ALWAYS had a tendency to decide things by myself, to go my own way, in short, to do whatever the hell I wanted. Sometimes it's worked out great and sometimes it has not worked at all! Those times have taught me that I DO NOT KNOW EVERYTHING!

Now I'm a pretty talented guy, but NOBODY CAN DO IT ALL BY THEMSELVES! It doesn't matter what area of life we are talking about. Whether it's running a real estate business, or running a coaching business, or trying to lose weight or just trying to stay motivated. There are people out there who can help us! It is up to us, to go and FIND THEM!

MAKING NEW ASSOCIATIONS means meeting new people who can help you achieve your goals. But the rub is, they don't come and knock on your door! We have to step out of our comfort zones and go seek out their help. I am slowly getting better at this, for example, I have designed a piece of exercise equipment. I INSTANTLY RECOGNIZED MY LIMITATIONS IN THIS FIELD and went and sought out a product development company. I did my research and chose a company I was comfortable with. They are the experts in this field and I am not! To get my product to the marketplace, I AM MAKING NEW ASSOCIATIONS WITH THE PEOPLE AT THIS COMPANY!

It's the same for real estate, if you want to grow your business, YOU MUST SEARCH OUT THE EXPERTS AND MAKE NEW ASSO-CIATIONS. It could be a local top producer that you take to lunch, or an expert who teaches his tactics at a seminar, or it could be a real estate coach, or it could be someone who has written a book about real estate. A well written letter usually gets a response. Give it a try! If we want to improve our businesses, we must be smart enough to know what we don't know! I'm going to try and remember this lesson for the rest of my life. I want to make my life better for myself and my family, so I'm ALWAYS GOING TO LOOK FOR SOMEONE TO HELP ME ACHIEVE MY GOALS! I KNOW THEY'RE OUT THERE, BUT IT'S UP TO ME TO GO FIND THEM AND ASK FOR THEIR HELP! What about you?

Are you going to ask for help to make your life better?

“Variety is the spice of life”

10. Refine - Continually Try to Improve

This step is basically what this list is all about, this one step is the definition of this list.

As I stated, this one step is what this list is all about. EVERY SINGLE ONE OF US WANTS OUR LIFE TO BE BETTER! Even if you have a great life, it can be better. We can do more, we can be more, we can help others more, we can enjoy life more. There is no limit to how much more our lives can be! I have been blessed with a great life, I have a beautiful wife, two amazing children, our health is good, we have a beautiful home in a beautiful area of the country, we have friends and family we love, we have hobbies we enjoy and we enjoy going places and seeing cool stuff! AND I AM TRULY GRATEFUL FOR MY BLESS-INGS! But that doesn't mean it can't be better! There is ALWAYS ANOTHER LEVEL TO ASPIRE TO! Step #10, basically means put all 9 earlier steps into action and then take a look. If you want to make a change in a certain area of your life that is caus-ing you pain, begin to put these ideas into force in your life and keep try-ing! NOTHING CHANGES OVERNIGHT, PROGRESS TAKES TIME! You job is to NOT GIVE UP! EVER! For example, I struggle with my eating all the time! I love to eat goodies, cookies, cakes, chips, all the bad stuff for me. But I know it's not good for me and I want to eat healthier. I TRY EVERY SINGLE DAY TO EAT HEALTHY! Do I succeed every day? Of course not, nobody's perfect, but there are many days that I do great! And on the days I slip, I don't beat myself up anymore, I ask myself what's going on in my life, I answer honestly and I move on to the next day! And I try to eat healthy again! EVERY DAY I TRY TO IMPROVE MY EATING HABITS! It's the EXACT SAME THING WITH ANY AREA OF YOUR LIFE. Once you decide that there is an area of your life you want to im-prove, the steps are all the same. If you want to improve your real estate business, put a plan of action into place, then take action and never, ever stop trying to make your business better! Some days you will fail, you'll fall back into your old hab-its. SO WHAT? TODAY IS A NEW DAY TO TRY AGAIN! Don't spend time beating yourself up. Pick yourself back up and try again! Never stop trying to make your business better and never stop trying to make your life better! There is no other way! The other choice of doing nothing will get you exactly that, NOTHING! There are a million examples of people never giving up and trying to improve their lives, but one of my favorites is a bout JFK Jr. Do you remember when JFK Jr. was having a tough time passing the New York State Bar exam? I think he failed it 2 or 3 times and he was being crucified in the press for being a dope. Well, I was watching a news cast one day, and JFK Jr. had just failed the latest bar exam and he was being hounded by the press for a quote or an explanation, and he simply turned and looked at them and said, "I GUESS IT'S BACK AT IT THEN!" I guess it's back at it, what a great way of thinking! No BS, no crying about it, just "IT'S BACK AT IT THEN." I've never forgot-ten that news clip and I hope you never do. Anytime I fall back, I simply think, "IT"S BACK AT IT THEN" JFK Jr. understood it, I understand it! There is no other acceptable choice. If we want our live s to be better, WE HAVE TO KEEP TRYING TO MAKE THEM BETTER! IT DOESN'T HAPPEN ALL BY ITSELF! IT IS UP TO US! Next time you fall back, what are you going to do? Are you going to accept it or be like JFK Jr. and say "BACK AT IT THEN!"

I know my choice, how about you?

“I guess it’s back at it then” - John F Kennedy, Jr.

11. Help Others

We are winding down our list. I hope you have been able to work some of these ideas into

your lives, because we ALL want to live a more productive and fulfilling life. Our next

step is a good one, HELP OTHERS!

On a list that is supposed to help me improve my life, why does it include helping others? I'll put aside the real value of helping others for a moment and talk about how it ACTUALLY HELPS US TO HELP OTHERS. In my business, I spend a lot of time trying to help Realtors improve their lives and their businesses. And EVERY TIME I make a suggestion or pass on an idea, I get to hear it also. If I write a blog that shares advice with the read-ers, I have to read it myself first. I hear, read and think about ideas on how to improve our lives all day long. IT EVENTUALLY RUBS OFF! All this information makes me a better person, it makes me more aware of what I'm doing. It makes me question if I am taking my own advice. It keeps me honest. IT KEEPS ME PUSHING TO IMPROVE MY LIFE! If you want to improve your real estate business, include in your arsenal helping others. Reach out to other Realtors, offer advice, brainstorm, share information. The more you do, the more you get to hear it, and eventually it will rub off on YOU TOO! Now for the other reason to help others. The late entertainer Danny Thomas said, "Success in life is in what you do for oth-ers." I couldn't agree more. Until you turn your talents and knowledge to helping others, you are not truly successful. It does-n't matter how much money you have or how many people know your name, there is no higher form of living than helping oth-ers! Most extremely successful people in this world eventually understand this. Look at Oprah's example. Bill and Melinda Gates, Warren Buffett, Angelina and Brad. All of them are doing amazing work to help others. It is the FINEST MEASURE OF A PER-SON! So in our world, we should be helping others. Share your knowledge and gifts. Lend a helping hand or a sympathetic ear.

REMEMBER, SUCCESS IN LIFE IS IN WHAT YOU DO FOR OTHERS!

“There is no higher form of living then helping others”

12. Don’t Be Afraid

Well, this is the last step in our 12 ideas to help us improve our lives. This one step will make everything else work.

Before I get going, let me give you a disclaimer right from the beginning. I BELIEVE EVERYTHING WE DO NOT ACHIEVE IN OUR LIVES IS BECAUSE WE ARE AFRAID OF SOMETHING! I BELIEVE FEAR IS WHAT HOLDS US BACK FROM EVERYTHING!

If you have read some of my posts before, you know my all-time favorite self help book is "FEARLESS LIVING" by Rhonda Britten. If you haven't read it yet, you should, it's brilliant! Rhonda talks about that basically we all have the same fear. In some form, WE ARE ALL AFRAID THAT WE ARE NOT GOOD ENOUGH IN SOME WAY!

It may be that we think we are not smart enough, or that we aren't talented enough, or we are not good looking enough, or that we can't speak eloquently enough, or that we just simply aren't good enough! Whatever your version is, it really doesn't matter, because I've come to learn that if we want our lives to be better, we have to do some things that might scare us! If you don't believe me that some form of fear holds you back from being more, let me ask you a few questions. What are your true dreams and goals? What do you really want to accomplish in this life? Are you taking any steps towards your goals? What's holding you back? Are you afraid someone in your life might not approve of your choices? Are you afraid you might lose some money? Are you afraid that maybe you don't have the all the talents you need? Have you started and stopped several times? WHY DO YOU THINK THAT IS?

If we answer these questions honestly, there will be some form of fear mixed in there. These are the facts, but that's okay! Fear is a completely normal emotion. OUR JOB IS TO ACKNOWLEDGE OUR FEAR AND KEEP MOVING FORWARD! WE HAVE TO ACCEPT THAT SOME THINGS ARE GOING TO SCARE US! However, to accomplish all the things we would like to, we have to move forward anyway!

Because if you think about it, what's the worst that can happen? What is there to be afraid of? If you open up a new business and it fails, yes, you may lose some money, but they not going to shoot you! They're not going to take away your loved ones. You lost some money, big deal! You can always make more money if you don't give up! Maybe you'll try something and fail, and someone very close to you loses some respect for you. So what? If that person is that simple minded, maybe you shouldn't be around them any way! Now I know this may sound harsh, but I am talking from personal experience and I have learned not to be afraid to try something new if it is something I truly want to do!

I HONESTLY DO NOT CARE WHAT ANYONE ELSE THINKS! I AM THE JUDGE OF MY SELF WORTH! I DO NOT GIVE ANYONE ELSE THAT POWER. I am not afraid of what any one else thinks of me. I know I am a good person and that's all that matters. I am human like everyone else and I make plenty of mistakes, but I try to learn from them and I NEVER WORRY WHAT SOME ONE ELSE THINKS!

If I could help you with one thing from this list, it would be this. DON'T BE AFRAID! Don't be afraid of failure, don't be afraid of what other people think or say. ONLY YOU SHOULD BE THE JUDGE OF YOU! DO NOT GIVE THAT POWER TO ANYONE ELSE! BE COURAGEOUS! BE FEARLESS! TAKE RISKS! LEARN FROM YOUR MISTAKES! TAKE MORE RISKS! AND REMEMBER, THEY'RE NOT GOING TO SHOOT YOU IF YOU FAIL! AND YOU WILL SOMETMES, BUT THE PEOPLE IN THIS WORLD WHO ACHIEVE SOMETHING WORTHWHILE, DO NOT GIVE UP AND THEY ARE NOT AFRAID OF TAKING ANOTHER STEP!

We can all be that person! All it takes is the belief in your dreams and the understanding that no one else's opinion of you matters. The only person's whose opinion of you that matters is your own! If you don't believe it yet, I hope that you will start believing it right now! I KNOW IT TO BE ABSO-LUTELY TRUE AND I WANT THE SAME FOR YOU! BUT ONLY YOU CAN MAKE THAT HAPPEN!

START TODAY! DON'T BE AFRAID!

“We are all afraid that we are not good enough ins some way… We have to accept that some things are going to scare us… and we have to move forward anyway.”

Kevin Bungert

Kevin Bungert is the owner, head coach and motivation behind Living Well Sys-tems, Inc., a personal motivation and coaching company located in East Northport, NY. LWS caters to real estate sales professionals, and helps agents create more business, which creates more profit, which creates a better life for the agent and their family. LWS was founded by Kevin in 2005 after a 14 year career as real estate profes-sional. After obtaining his real estate license in 1994, Kevin quickly became the top producing agent at Century 21 Vipen in Kings Park, NY and opened his first office in his home town of East Northport, NY in 1996. In 2003, Kevin opened his second Century 21 Family Real Estate in the beauti-ful town of Northport, NY, and during his time as broker and owner of Century 21 Family, Kevin hired and trained over 150 agents, bringing several of them to the top designation of Centurion.

Copyright © Kevin Bungert 2008